Thursday 25th May, 2017               1740

I am getting pissed off with Chinese train timetable sites. They can never agree. One site will tell me I need to be at the airport 90 minutes too early, another that there is one that is perfect.

 With the Shenyang Shag arriving on Saturday (sorry Steve, not the meaning you know but another one the Old Conways - and only them - will understand!) and who is concerned about meeting up with our other friends Jens and Shona (who are arriving tomorrow evening) as swiftly as possible and so the earlier the train the better. Two sites say two hours’ wait and two say not so long!

Tomorrow I shall set my classes a quick task - to find me the best times to and from the airport. If the students tell me then I will believe it. Don’t believe all you read on the internet or the Daily Mail!

Steve thought I was taking him on a guided tour when he arrived and in thinking of his friends, he asked if we could skip that and go the quick way. There is a slightly quicker way, a cab but that would cost about 150y and from memory when I first arrived and was collected by the school car, still takes over an hour and what a dismal journey it is. For 15 to 20 minutes more you can see the city and the river and it’s cheaper too. Much cheaper. Anyway, the route we will take is the reverse of the route I will take to get there. It’s a shame Joan isn’t here, she met them all two years ago when I took her to Shenyang.

Tonight was bubble’n’squeak night. I finished it all but I have yet to fathom how anyone fries it in patties/cakes and they stay together? I just get a mush and a God-awful mess sticking to the frying pan when I do it!!

There’s an old woman who lives somewhere nearby. I often see her from my window or when I am out and about getting my shopping. It’s difficult to gauge the age of the Chinese, the young ones look like children and the older ones could be any vintage. My guess is she’s 238 years old. Anyway, I call her Grandma although I doubt she understands me. In fact for my sake I hope so.

The first time I said “ni hao” to her I was rewarded with a look that could shatter a mirror. She walks with a cane and it is painstaking to watch. I’d like to pit her against my snail in a race and still back the snail. But she does it day after day and it simply HAS to hurt but no, she gets God knows where every single day, rain or shine. I’d get an e-trike personally.

Anyway, we have gone from frosty glares now to a ni hao in return and occasionally the glimmer of a smile. Sometimes I stop and chat with her. Completely idiotic I know because neither can understand the other but it probably gives her something to talk about with her Chinese visitors ( I hope she gets some) as much as it gave me something to write here.

I would hate to be her grandson though. Whilst I as a youngster was naughty with my mother, my Grandma only had to look at me with “that” look and I was chastened. This old girl would turn me into a pillar of salt! Bless her and I hope I never have to report that I see her no more.

Time to shut up now, I have eaten and am now about to have a Chinese wagon wheel to take away the taste. They are smaller than when I was a child but whereas the UK ones shrunk and maintained their price, I can buy a pack of 15 for the cost of two in the UK!!