Saturday 31st January, 2015 1800
It’s cold.
Yesterday Mulan and I went for breakfast and shopping (her sister Sarah didn’t want to come as she was busy preparing her lesson plans for later in the day). In McDonald’s Mulan used her phone to scan one of those odd black and white squares on a counter advertisement. The last time we went there she searched on her phone for deals and once she had eaten her breakfast and the menu changed to the daytime one, she procured a chicken sandwich for one mao (one penny). Well yesterday whatever the offer was, she didn’t go for it because she had to like or visit too many advertisements and so gave up. Personally, if it isn’t a paper coupon in my hand I can’t be bothered and even if I have coupons they are either for things I don’t want or by the time I do they have expired.
After that it was off to the chemist for two months worth of medicine and then the supermarket. I had decided that yes, I would treat them to a chilli for dinner but on the bus on the way back Mulan informed me Sarah wouldn’t eat with us as her headmaster (for that read private school owner) was treating the teachers to dinner. I am well used to such late changes of plans now considering they occur frequently here.
Nonetheless I made the chilli and Mulan was really late back from teaching her two kids, it was about ten when she got back. I had left Sarah in charge of the rice cooker (I don’t know how to use them properly, give me a saucepan and lid any day!) but when Mulan arrived she confessed she had forgotten to switch the thing on! Absolutely amazing considering I had gone to their room to tell her she could start the rice!
So it came to pass that Mulan and I sat down in front of my laptop for dinner at eleven. And had I made a lulu of a chill! It had beautifully thick sauce and was perfect but for one thing - it blew my head off. It was too good for me to worry about the pain involved in eating it and after a while Mulan decided to go and eat it in her and Sarah’s room. A couple of minutes later Sarah came to me to ask if she could have some! This is the girl who had already had dinner. She had tasted her sister’s and decided it was so spicy and delicious she could fit some in. One man’s poison………..
This morning Mulan and I went to Helen’s school. You may recall I test pronunciation at her little place once in the spring festival and twice in summer holidays. Although it was a bit parky I decided we could take the bike. Mulan had other ideas - she was cold riding pillion so it had to be the number seven bus and a walk at the other end. Not only that, the number seven has heating now so the price is 2y each and she hadn’t taken any coins - luckily I had taken enough for both of us.
Helen only has four small classes this winter but even so it took two and a half hours. I had bought and paid for four little LED rechargeable desk lamps to give to each of the top students in each class. Last time I bought fountain pens. The recipients all seemed surprised to get one, Helen normally gives a cheap pen and notebook to the top three in the classes, my lamps cost 32y each. But then, Mulan and I got a free lunch for my trouble afterwards. That was followed by a trek to get a rather crowded bus back, although she did bag a seat and keep it for me after I had paid the fares.
Poor old Pepsi never got to go out today for any length of time. She will get her late night walk of course but I just couldn’t face the bike ride to find a new watering hole now nearly everything has closed for the duration. Sarah is staying elsewhere tonight and I really don’t fancy cooking at 2200 so I have suggested to Mulan she gets fed in town. I have one pie for me (God knows what’s in it but it will do). I would have taken her to a restaurant but her teaching gets in the way. But hey, all praise for them for trying to earn some money to relieve some pressure on their uncle, who it seems is currently in hospital. That will be costing him.
Three weeks today the plan is to put Pepsi into care and go to Anqing for two nights and I visit Yvonne. I would have gone before but she has a temporary job until the new year on the 19th. I can only hope it won’t be too cold because of having to take Pepsi on the bike to the vet. I can however ask the girls to get a taxi firm number and get them to call one for me when I want to leave - they will of course be with their uncle for the celebrations. I think Mulan is harbouring thoughts of sending a car at new year to collect the dog and I to have a Chinese new year with them. I don’t know how many bedrooms the uncle has but I already know there are no local hotels in her home village. We shall see.
Saturday, 31 January 2015
Thursday, 29 January 2015
Wednesday 28th January, 2015 1700
Yesterday as planned, the only time I set foot outside was when the dog needed to go out. It was cold and wet and I never needed to go to the local supermarket and so simply stayed in the warm.
Yesterday also heralded the commencement of a renewed assault on VPN usage in China, with the BBC reporting it at length. It’s annoying and inconvenient from my perspective for a few reasons. Firstly, Gmail is blocked here and that’s what I use, secondly anything to do with Google is also interfered with so as I use Chrome it means it won’t translate automatically and thirdly it makes obtaining anything by way of TV or films hard. Thankfully there are programmers out there who devise new methods of circumnavigating The Great Firewall.
I was a bit naughty last night though, I stayed up until five this morning and so never got up until midday, at which time I was greeted by an email with a proofreading job. With the number of words I expected it to take perhaps thirty or forty minutes depending on how many mistakes there were but it ended up taking three hours! It wasn’t proofreading, more a translation and I had to use the computer to try to figure out what they were trying to say. Worse, the client had specified that they wanted it to look as if it was written by a native speaker. Anyone who has read Chinglish will know that no matter how you tidy it up it still doesn’t look authentic. I virtually rewrote the entire thing, which was advertising laptop bags. I have now informed those in charge that should anything like that crop up again it will not be accepted at the same rate as the bread and butter stuff. I don’t mind doing it but I need the rewards to be commensurate, as does everyone.
So far today I have only poked my head out once for Pepsi’s pee but shortly I will walk her. Then at six we are leaving in Kevin’s car for his farewell meal, he leaves for Blighty tomorrow. I might remember to take my camera too as he has invited two strange women for dinner.
Thursday 29th 1430
Well dinner last night was at the much-rumoured new pizza place. Mulan, Kevin and I went by car and met Tina and her “Godmother” - who can’t possibly be that seeing as they aren’t Christians so Kevin and I came to the conclusion she is a favourite aunt. I think the aunt was dragged along as a chaperone just in case although she ate lustily and indeed was rather chatty in Chinese and at times, broken English.
With the state of my gnashers the last thing I can order is a steak but I have to say the menu at this place has what appears to be a good selection of western dishes. I say “appears” because so many of these places offer so much but what comes on the plate disappoints. Pre-warned by Kevin that the pizzas were tasty but in true Chinese style the bases were sweet, nonetheless I ordered a Hawaiian. I won’t repeat the error. I will however, once my mouth is sorted, have a steak, he and the two girls did and enjoyed them, Godmother had a Chinese dish. At 225y for five including beers, fruit, soup and lemonade it was surprisingly reasonable and when Kevin paid, rather than getting discount vouchers he got to choose a numbered table tennis ball from a blind box. It was number four (unlucky here) and it won him a travel eating set of small knife, fork, spoon and chopsticks in a nice little case. I want one!
Afterwards when the two strangers left we went to a new western bar I was taken to once about a month ago. It’s expensive but if I am still here after next term it will be somewhere I can go and sit outside in the summer. As Kevin had paid for the meal it was my shout and I bought Baileys for Mulan, Jim Beam for Kevin (ugh!) and a dark rum and coke for me. Then the owner presented us at our table three big glasses of German black beer. It fell to me to drink them because Mulan didn‘t like the taste and Kevin was driving. I was up to the task thankfully and eventually got to drink the first rum I have had in years. I couldn’t have gin because they never had tonic and didn’t even know what it was! When I go back I will take my own.
It wasn’t as late a night as the last one but by the time I cooked for the animals it was midnight before Pepsi got her walk. She is definitely now in season. “Stumpy”, the little black dog who she always avoided and he always chased her away if she strayed onto his territory, now shows an active interest, as does she in him. He tried to get his leg over and I had the devil’s own job to get her to come with me, she kept running back to him. I succeeded in preventing anything terrible happening last night but there was a five minute period a few nights back when she disappeared and I couldn’t see her because the lights were out. I am now sweating in case she has conceived. I really don’t want that again! The trouble is, it will cost me 800-1,000y to have her done and I have already spent a small fortune on having various animals neutered. This is the first time in her almost three years of life that she has given cause for concern.
Mulan and I went for McBreakfast this morning, she being rather sluggish at the starting gate due to the single glass of Baileys she had the night before, and then she shopped for books for her sister while I did the supermarket bit. By the time I came out it was snowing.
1830
I had a nap which was abbreviated with the onset of toothache so perhaps I will need to go to the dentist before the holidays are over. Mulan’s sister is now here (I am sure I will get her name later!) and once Mulan returns from her errand of mercy (taking money to their baby brother) we will have a dinner of macaroni au gratin, which, if they don’t like, can be supplemented with delicious Pot Noodles! It may be chilli tomorrow.
It has stopped snowing and thankfully it only settled on the grass so if my want takes me I will be able to have breakfast again tomorrow. In fact I think I will insist because Mulan promised to pay next time and there will be three of us! It also means more bottles of wine can be carried back - at a third of the price locally I can never have enough and of course in time I will be either stranded here for a couple of days or faced with a freezing cold ride. Far better to just stay in the warm.
Yesterday as planned, the only time I set foot outside was when the dog needed to go out. It was cold and wet and I never needed to go to the local supermarket and so simply stayed in the warm.
Yesterday also heralded the commencement of a renewed assault on VPN usage in China, with the BBC reporting it at length. It’s annoying and inconvenient from my perspective for a few reasons. Firstly, Gmail is blocked here and that’s what I use, secondly anything to do with Google is also interfered with so as I use Chrome it means it won’t translate automatically and thirdly it makes obtaining anything by way of TV or films hard. Thankfully there are programmers out there who devise new methods of circumnavigating The Great Firewall.
I was a bit naughty last night though, I stayed up until five this morning and so never got up until midday, at which time I was greeted by an email with a proofreading job. With the number of words I expected it to take perhaps thirty or forty minutes depending on how many mistakes there were but it ended up taking three hours! It wasn’t proofreading, more a translation and I had to use the computer to try to figure out what they were trying to say. Worse, the client had specified that they wanted it to look as if it was written by a native speaker. Anyone who has read Chinglish will know that no matter how you tidy it up it still doesn’t look authentic. I virtually rewrote the entire thing, which was advertising laptop bags. I have now informed those in charge that should anything like that crop up again it will not be accepted at the same rate as the bread and butter stuff. I don’t mind doing it but I need the rewards to be commensurate, as does everyone.
So far today I have only poked my head out once for Pepsi’s pee but shortly I will walk her. Then at six we are leaving in Kevin’s car for his farewell meal, he leaves for Blighty tomorrow. I might remember to take my camera too as he has invited two strange women for dinner.
Thursday 29th 1430
Well dinner last night was at the much-rumoured new pizza place. Mulan, Kevin and I went by car and met Tina and her “Godmother” - who can’t possibly be that seeing as they aren’t Christians so Kevin and I came to the conclusion she is a favourite aunt. I think the aunt was dragged along as a chaperone just in case although she ate lustily and indeed was rather chatty in Chinese and at times, broken English.
With the state of my gnashers the last thing I can order is a steak but I have to say the menu at this place has what appears to be a good selection of western dishes. I say “appears” because so many of these places offer so much but what comes on the plate disappoints. Pre-warned by Kevin that the pizzas were tasty but in true Chinese style the bases were sweet, nonetheless I ordered a Hawaiian. I won’t repeat the error. I will however, once my mouth is sorted, have a steak, he and the two girls did and enjoyed them, Godmother had a Chinese dish. At 225y for five including beers, fruit, soup and lemonade it was surprisingly reasonable and when Kevin paid, rather than getting discount vouchers he got to choose a numbered table tennis ball from a blind box. It was number four (unlucky here) and it won him a travel eating set of small knife, fork, spoon and chopsticks in a nice little case. I want one!
Afterwards when the two strangers left we went to a new western bar I was taken to once about a month ago. It’s expensive but if I am still here after next term it will be somewhere I can go and sit outside in the summer. As Kevin had paid for the meal it was my shout and I bought Baileys for Mulan, Jim Beam for Kevin (ugh!) and a dark rum and coke for me. Then the owner presented us at our table three big glasses of German black beer. It fell to me to drink them because Mulan didn‘t like the taste and Kevin was driving. I was up to the task thankfully and eventually got to drink the first rum I have had in years. I couldn’t have gin because they never had tonic and didn’t even know what it was! When I go back I will take my own.
It wasn’t as late a night as the last one but by the time I cooked for the animals it was midnight before Pepsi got her walk. She is definitely now in season. “Stumpy”, the little black dog who she always avoided and he always chased her away if she strayed onto his territory, now shows an active interest, as does she in him. He tried to get his leg over and I had the devil’s own job to get her to come with me, she kept running back to him. I succeeded in preventing anything terrible happening last night but there was a five minute period a few nights back when she disappeared and I couldn’t see her because the lights were out. I am now sweating in case she has conceived. I really don’t want that again! The trouble is, it will cost me 800-1,000y to have her done and I have already spent a small fortune on having various animals neutered. This is the first time in her almost three years of life that she has given cause for concern.
Mulan and I went for McBreakfast this morning, she being rather sluggish at the starting gate due to the single glass of Baileys she had the night before, and then she shopped for books for her sister while I did the supermarket bit. By the time I came out it was snowing.
1830
I had a nap which was abbreviated with the onset of toothache so perhaps I will need to go to the dentist before the holidays are over. Mulan’s sister is now here (I am sure I will get her name later!) and once Mulan returns from her errand of mercy (taking money to their baby brother) we will have a dinner of macaroni au gratin, which, if they don’t like, can be supplemented with delicious Pot Noodles! It may be chilli tomorrow.
It has stopped snowing and thankfully it only settled on the grass so if my want takes me I will be able to have breakfast again tomorrow. In fact I think I will insist because Mulan promised to pay next time and there will be three of us! It also means more bottles of wine can be carried back - at a third of the price locally I can never have enough and of course in time I will be either stranded here for a couple of days or faced with a freezing cold ride. Far better to just stay in the warm.
Monday, 26 January 2015
Monday 26th January, 2015 2015
The first time we had rehearsals the studio was empty and eventually another two acts turned up. Yesterday was entirely different. When we got there the place was heaving. Unbeknown to me, this was to be a full rehearsal of the entire show. Not only that, every seat was occupied by parents, friends or family of those taking part, many of whom are child dancers.
Stage fright is not something I suffer from but I will admit to a twinge of cock-up fright - ie me buggering it up. If nothing else, I will look the part, for my and Wolfgang’s tang suits were brought. Light navy blue jacket and trousers, the latter being elasticated but the former equipped with some form of toggle which utterly defeated me so I had to get the girls to “do me up” (and afterwards undo me!).
Once the rehearsals started Mulan was like a puppy on a polished toilet seat. With dismay she suddenly realised she had forgotten her phone and, being unable to take photos, she borrowed a phone to call a friend to bring one to her. Seeing her unbounded joy at being part of the spectacle I informed Sally and her friend Molly that I really, really want Mulan and her sister to be able to come to the big night when they actually film it for broadcast. I don’t care if they have to stand, I would just like to give them a happy experience, given the terrible life they have had.
It turned out there are 14 acts in the show, of which we are tenth. In the Chinese programme we are billed as Steve from England and Wolfgang from Germany - good to see they got the order correct even if it was only because they went alphabetically both in name and country!
When our turn came there was little time to do anything other than observe the “boss” until he got to the bit where we follow in somewhat poor synchronisation. I reckon we are on stage for all of two minutes but our small contribution seemed to go without a hitch. Once the rehearsals had finished, the producer and director both made extended speeches critiquing the acts and making suggestions for improvement. At one point Sally and Molly broke off conversation with me in order to hear what they were going to say about our “performance”. Either they are both lying or the show officials are being kind to foreigners because they never mentioned anything wrong with our bit.
Before that though, we were going to be taken to the Sichuan restaurant. I had requested it rather than back to school because I didn’t want to cook and wanted to take Mulan for dinner. Because Mulan was so engrossed in the show I asked if we could wait until it finished and they agreed. Now. I had noticed a heavy police presence in the building, not just police but by their uniforms they were SWAT teams if the back patches were to be believed.
Of course at my age ALL policemen look young but some of these looked as if they could be students in my university. Seeing as they were one of the acts they simply had to be actors and actresses. When they had done their turn and were leaving, I said to one of the girls, they ARE actors, aren’t they? She didn’t know so I asked her to ask them. Her calls of “Ni hao” went completely ignored, so I strode over to one of the stragglers and tapped him on the shoulder so the question could be asked. They in fact are genuine SWAT police! Presumably that also means the assault rifles they were carrying are also real but hopefully minus ammunition.
I invited both Sally and Molly to join us for dinner. Sally declined as she had to go and take her daughter to evening class but Molly agreed. She is a delightful lass (and I am sorry now that I never took my camera but that was because I thought it would be the same as last time) and her English is very good. She scored 7.0 in her IELTS test, which is enough to get her into any university abroad (and if I am right she currently teaches at No. 3 middle school here) and she is vacillating between Oz and Kiwi. Based purely on personal opinion I advised Kiwi - cheaper and far more relaxed. I hope she gets an opportunity to go to either, she will make friends wherever she goes.
We had a nice meal at the Sichuan place (once again I ordered far too much and once again when I presented my discount vouchers the bloody things had expired - why can’t they use the English dating system instead of the Yank one???) and Mulan, when she realised the lateness of the hour, suddenly rushed off to teach her two students, leaving us alone until a colleague of Molly’s arrived. Then it was time to leave, toting the bag with my new Sunday best within. Mind you, the trousers don’t have flies…..
This morning I took Mulan for a Mcbreakfast. The bus stopped to pick up a reasonably young woman not long after we left and she came and sat in front of me, putting what looked like a bundle of cloth on the seat in front. No problem with that of course because the bus wasn’t full. It did though become standing room only a bit later. A girl boarded, saw what she thought was an empty seat, approached and on seeing the bundle, gave a despairing look and went and stood. I thought this was unbelievable and incredibly selfish on the part of the woman in front and said so to Mulan. I think she knew I was going to be a terrible foreigner and she was right. I made the woman move the bundle, after all, she could put it on her lap or on the floor so why should someone have to stand? Embarrassed into it, she did so and I indicated to the standing girl she now had a seat. To my amazement the other woman stood in front of the seat she had placed the bundle on! Nonplussed I asked Mulan to ask her why she didn’t put it on the deck. The reason? It was a curtain and it was still damp from washing! She was quite happy to see someone stand for half an hour because she was taking her laundry home without a bag. Eventually what little brain she possesses worked out that she could in fact sit in the seat and balance the curtain on the rail in front. Doubtless she will have gone home and related a tale of the barbarian ogre on the bus.
Mulan really doesn’t like anything sweet and grimaced when she tried the strawberry jam on her muffin. Next time I think she will be better off having a sausage and egg combo but in fairness it was her first time in McDonald’s. Afterwards we had a spare key cut for when her sister arrives and then went to RT Mart and caught the bus home. I was knackered but still took Pepsi out, going to the local supermarket for liquids at the same time. It looks as if today was their last and so I took all the remaining cans of my preferred pijou and then after some unintelligible cajoling and goodwill on my part, their entire remaining stock of medicine wine/gutrot. Saves them having to carry it to storage and I will drink it anyway but God it was heavy carrying it upstairs.
For three days now an e-bike has been parked and covered up in “my” space, causing problems when I want to charge mine as my extension isn’t that long. It hasn’t moved, ergo the idiot who owns it has left for the duration and in typical Chinese fashion has not only had no consideration for others but alarmed the damned thing as well, which means when you try to move it the back wheel locks. It has now been dragged elsewhere (I did get puffed out) and if the mood so takes me, over the course of the holiday I may well move it a bit at a time to somewhere they can’t see when they return and they will think it has been stolen, probably in the adjacent section.
After that I simply had to sleep and earlier I went to the office for what transpires will be my last ale there for a while, they will finish up at close of business tonight. Tomorrow the hunt will be on for a temporary alternative dog friendly watering hole.
Here is a photo, sadly taken on a phone from a distance, of us “doing our thing”. I am the fat one on the left.
The first time we had rehearsals the studio was empty and eventually another two acts turned up. Yesterday was entirely different. When we got there the place was heaving. Unbeknown to me, this was to be a full rehearsal of the entire show. Not only that, every seat was occupied by parents, friends or family of those taking part, many of whom are child dancers.
Stage fright is not something I suffer from but I will admit to a twinge of cock-up fright - ie me buggering it up. If nothing else, I will look the part, for my and Wolfgang’s tang suits were brought. Light navy blue jacket and trousers, the latter being elasticated but the former equipped with some form of toggle which utterly defeated me so I had to get the girls to “do me up” (and afterwards undo me!).
Once the rehearsals started Mulan was like a puppy on a polished toilet seat. With dismay she suddenly realised she had forgotten her phone and, being unable to take photos, she borrowed a phone to call a friend to bring one to her. Seeing her unbounded joy at being part of the spectacle I informed Sally and her friend Molly that I really, really want Mulan and her sister to be able to come to the big night when they actually film it for broadcast. I don’t care if they have to stand, I would just like to give them a happy experience, given the terrible life they have had.
It turned out there are 14 acts in the show, of which we are tenth. In the Chinese programme we are billed as Steve from England and Wolfgang from Germany - good to see they got the order correct even if it was only because they went alphabetically both in name and country!
When our turn came there was little time to do anything other than observe the “boss” until he got to the bit where we follow in somewhat poor synchronisation. I reckon we are on stage for all of two minutes but our small contribution seemed to go without a hitch. Once the rehearsals had finished, the producer and director both made extended speeches critiquing the acts and making suggestions for improvement. At one point Sally and Molly broke off conversation with me in order to hear what they were going to say about our “performance”. Either they are both lying or the show officials are being kind to foreigners because they never mentioned anything wrong with our bit.
Before that though, we were going to be taken to the Sichuan restaurant. I had requested it rather than back to school because I didn’t want to cook and wanted to take Mulan for dinner. Because Mulan was so engrossed in the show I asked if we could wait until it finished and they agreed. Now. I had noticed a heavy police presence in the building, not just police but by their uniforms they were SWAT teams if the back patches were to be believed.
Of course at my age ALL policemen look young but some of these looked as if they could be students in my university. Seeing as they were one of the acts they simply had to be actors and actresses. When they had done their turn and were leaving, I said to one of the girls, they ARE actors, aren’t they? She didn’t know so I asked her to ask them. Her calls of “Ni hao” went completely ignored, so I strode over to one of the stragglers and tapped him on the shoulder so the question could be asked. They in fact are genuine SWAT police! Presumably that also means the assault rifles they were carrying are also real but hopefully minus ammunition.
I invited both Sally and Molly to join us for dinner. Sally declined as she had to go and take her daughter to evening class but Molly agreed. She is a delightful lass (and I am sorry now that I never took my camera but that was because I thought it would be the same as last time) and her English is very good. She scored 7.0 in her IELTS test, which is enough to get her into any university abroad (and if I am right she currently teaches at No. 3 middle school here) and she is vacillating between Oz and Kiwi. Based purely on personal opinion I advised Kiwi - cheaper and far more relaxed. I hope she gets an opportunity to go to either, she will make friends wherever she goes.
We had a nice meal at the Sichuan place (once again I ordered far too much and once again when I presented my discount vouchers the bloody things had expired - why can’t they use the English dating system instead of the Yank one???) and Mulan, when she realised the lateness of the hour, suddenly rushed off to teach her two students, leaving us alone until a colleague of Molly’s arrived. Then it was time to leave, toting the bag with my new Sunday best within. Mind you, the trousers don’t have flies…..
This morning I took Mulan for a Mcbreakfast. The bus stopped to pick up a reasonably young woman not long after we left and she came and sat in front of me, putting what looked like a bundle of cloth on the seat in front. No problem with that of course because the bus wasn’t full. It did though become standing room only a bit later. A girl boarded, saw what she thought was an empty seat, approached and on seeing the bundle, gave a despairing look and went and stood. I thought this was unbelievable and incredibly selfish on the part of the woman in front and said so to Mulan. I think she knew I was going to be a terrible foreigner and she was right. I made the woman move the bundle, after all, she could put it on her lap or on the floor so why should someone have to stand? Embarrassed into it, she did so and I indicated to the standing girl she now had a seat. To my amazement the other woman stood in front of the seat she had placed the bundle on! Nonplussed I asked Mulan to ask her why she didn’t put it on the deck. The reason? It was a curtain and it was still damp from washing! She was quite happy to see someone stand for half an hour because she was taking her laundry home without a bag. Eventually what little brain she possesses worked out that she could in fact sit in the seat and balance the curtain on the rail in front. Doubtless she will have gone home and related a tale of the barbarian ogre on the bus.
Mulan really doesn’t like anything sweet and grimaced when she tried the strawberry jam on her muffin. Next time I think she will be better off having a sausage and egg combo but in fairness it was her first time in McDonald’s. Afterwards we had a spare key cut for when her sister arrives and then went to RT Mart and caught the bus home. I was knackered but still took Pepsi out, going to the local supermarket for liquids at the same time. It looks as if today was their last and so I took all the remaining cans of my preferred pijou and then after some unintelligible cajoling and goodwill on my part, their entire remaining stock of medicine wine/gutrot. Saves them having to carry it to storage and I will drink it anyway but God it was heavy carrying it upstairs.
For three days now an e-bike has been parked and covered up in “my” space, causing problems when I want to charge mine as my extension isn’t that long. It hasn’t moved, ergo the idiot who owns it has left for the duration and in typical Chinese fashion has not only had no consideration for others but alarmed the damned thing as well, which means when you try to move it the back wheel locks. It has now been dragged elsewhere (I did get puffed out) and if the mood so takes me, over the course of the holiday I may well move it a bit at a time to somewhere they can’t see when they return and they will think it has been stolen, probably in the adjacent section.
After that I simply had to sleep and earlier I went to the office for what transpires will be my last ale there for a while, they will finish up at close of business tonight. Tomorrow the hunt will be on for a temporary alternative dog friendly watering hole.
Here is a photo, sadly taken on a phone from a distance, of us “doing our thing”. I am the fat one on the left.
Sunday, 25 January 2015
Saturday 24th January, 2015 1430
Dear me that was a wrench getting up yesterday morning! My own fault of course because I went to bed late and consequently felt awful by the time it came to go to our meeting with the police. There were only two foreign teachers there because Ollivier had already decamped about ten days previously. I wonder what would have happened if we had all gone elsewhere??
No free lunch afterwards as I suspected, however it was in fact mercifully brief, lasting about forty minutes. My little policewoman friend Bonnie was there as usual, along with a male colleague and their very stern-looking female boss. She is actually quite a nice woman, just gives off the aura of a dragon.
Working for other employers and the illegality of it was yet again brought up but in this instance it was mentioned that they had seen an advertisement for a school (either a flyer or in a newspaper) showing Kevin in a photo. This naturally caused mild consternation because it was news to us, not least of all Kevin. Subsequent enquiries have revealed that the foreigner in the picture has less hair than Kevin (I quipped that it must be Yul Brynner) however it is possible it could be me soon after one of the brutal haircuts I have adopted of late. People are trying to get a copy so we can see but I doubt they will. Either way, if it is either of us, our image was used without either our permission or knowledge. In a country where you can be a foreigner simply doing a supermarket shop and have clandestine photos taken of you on mobile phones I am sure the police realise what may have occurred.
But. I must give credit where it’s due. Miss Yin, the foreign affairs officer whom I have castigated so many times in the past, did something really wonderful at the meeting. She enquired as to the procedure for my obtaining a green card! Surprisingly, far from being met with a blank refusal, the police suggested that I go along for a chat after the holidays to investigate the possibility. I was stunned. I will definitely be paying them a visit! I imagine my chances are slim (very few of them are or have been issued to laowei over the years, even when married to a national) but as it is something I would love, I need to take the opportunity, slim though it is.
Mulan, who along with her younger sister will probably be house guests during the holiday, came later and promptly set about cleaning the bathroom. It wasn’t particularly dirty - at least I didn’t think so until I saw the result! No offence to Lucy but Mulan got it near enough as clean as the day I moved in. I can’t wait for her to turn her attention to the rest of the place although there was a cost. She broke the bathroom door latch.
This morning as forecast (which in itself is unusual) it was very mild and indeed now it is hovering just under 20C. I opted to take the bike to town. Breakfast first, shopping and then the search for a new latch. I must have gone to about thirty hardware shops to no avail and then a complete stranger indicated I should follow him on his bike. This kind gesture saw me find what I was looking for, an exact replacement so the screws fitted in the holes, and I was staggered by the price - 2y (20p). I bought two on the spot in case of further damages but will probably pop there again to get more spares for Ollivier and Kevin seeing as it is on the route I always take to town anyway. Mind you, with five days of cold and rain on the cards starting tomorrow, it may be a while before the bike ventures very far.
The campus is very quiet now although there are still stragglers leaving on the buses. Many of the campus shops and restaurants have closed, yesterday they were scrubbing down and I expect before long the new business street will become a ghost town as well. It would be handy if a couple at least stayed open so I have somewhere to take Pepsi for a change of scenery and I will certainly take a ride around to check.
Sunday 25th 1250
I think today is the last day before the dormitories close. Last night I was chatting with a lad who when asked said words to that effect. And as forecast (they are getting good!) we have had light rain this morning. Worse, it is being predicted it will be either cloudy or rainy for at least the next ten days. Why can’t it confine itself to term time?
In an hour the car will come and pick me up to take me for today’s rehearsal. I think I can remember most of the moves but although to the onlooker it appears simple, arms have to be bent at the elbow, hands have to be at such and such an angle etc and the master is quick to point out faults.
Sally from the foreign affairs office has advised the actual show will be about 90 minutes. I have no idea what else is in it apart from the fan dancers and youth footballers who turned up last time. I forgot to mention before that I was a shade disappointed when it became apparent they don’t have a Green Room. I would have enjoyed that a la Oliver Reed!
I think this evening rather than cooking, after we finish I will ask them to drop Mulan and I off at the Sichuan restaurant. I haven’t been there for a while and I have 80y in vouchers to use so it won’t cost much. I might also take her for breakfast in the morning and she can help carry the shopping back.
Dear me that was a wrench getting up yesterday morning! My own fault of course because I went to bed late and consequently felt awful by the time it came to go to our meeting with the police. There were only two foreign teachers there because Ollivier had already decamped about ten days previously. I wonder what would have happened if we had all gone elsewhere??
No free lunch afterwards as I suspected, however it was in fact mercifully brief, lasting about forty minutes. My little policewoman friend Bonnie was there as usual, along with a male colleague and their very stern-looking female boss. She is actually quite a nice woman, just gives off the aura of a dragon.
Working for other employers and the illegality of it was yet again brought up but in this instance it was mentioned that they had seen an advertisement for a school (either a flyer or in a newspaper) showing Kevin in a photo. This naturally caused mild consternation because it was news to us, not least of all Kevin. Subsequent enquiries have revealed that the foreigner in the picture has less hair than Kevin (I quipped that it must be Yul Brynner) however it is possible it could be me soon after one of the brutal haircuts I have adopted of late. People are trying to get a copy so we can see but I doubt they will. Either way, if it is either of us, our image was used without either our permission or knowledge. In a country where you can be a foreigner simply doing a supermarket shop and have clandestine photos taken of you on mobile phones I am sure the police realise what may have occurred.
But. I must give credit where it’s due. Miss Yin, the foreign affairs officer whom I have castigated so many times in the past, did something really wonderful at the meeting. She enquired as to the procedure for my obtaining a green card! Surprisingly, far from being met with a blank refusal, the police suggested that I go along for a chat after the holidays to investigate the possibility. I was stunned. I will definitely be paying them a visit! I imagine my chances are slim (very few of them are or have been issued to laowei over the years, even when married to a national) but as it is something I would love, I need to take the opportunity, slim though it is.
Mulan, who along with her younger sister will probably be house guests during the holiday, came later and promptly set about cleaning the bathroom. It wasn’t particularly dirty - at least I didn’t think so until I saw the result! No offence to Lucy but Mulan got it near enough as clean as the day I moved in. I can’t wait for her to turn her attention to the rest of the place although there was a cost. She broke the bathroom door latch.
This morning as forecast (which in itself is unusual) it was very mild and indeed now it is hovering just under 20C. I opted to take the bike to town. Breakfast first, shopping and then the search for a new latch. I must have gone to about thirty hardware shops to no avail and then a complete stranger indicated I should follow him on his bike. This kind gesture saw me find what I was looking for, an exact replacement so the screws fitted in the holes, and I was staggered by the price - 2y (20p). I bought two on the spot in case of further damages but will probably pop there again to get more spares for Ollivier and Kevin seeing as it is on the route I always take to town anyway. Mind you, with five days of cold and rain on the cards starting tomorrow, it may be a while before the bike ventures very far.
The campus is very quiet now although there are still stragglers leaving on the buses. Many of the campus shops and restaurants have closed, yesterday they were scrubbing down and I expect before long the new business street will become a ghost town as well. It would be handy if a couple at least stayed open so I have somewhere to take Pepsi for a change of scenery and I will certainly take a ride around to check.
Sunday 25th 1250
I think today is the last day before the dormitories close. Last night I was chatting with a lad who when asked said words to that effect. And as forecast (they are getting good!) we have had light rain this morning. Worse, it is being predicted it will be either cloudy or rainy for at least the next ten days. Why can’t it confine itself to term time?
In an hour the car will come and pick me up to take me for today’s rehearsal. I think I can remember most of the moves but although to the onlooker it appears simple, arms have to be bent at the elbow, hands have to be at such and such an angle etc and the master is quick to point out faults.
Sally from the foreign affairs office has advised the actual show will be about 90 minutes. I have no idea what else is in it apart from the fan dancers and youth footballers who turned up last time. I forgot to mention before that I was a shade disappointed when it became apparent they don’t have a Green Room. I would have enjoyed that a la Oliver Reed!
I think this evening rather than cooking, after we finish I will ask them to drop Mulan and I off at the Sichuan restaurant. I haven’t been there for a while and I have 80y in vouchers to use so it won’t cost much. I might also take her for breakfast in the morning and she can help carry the shopping back.
Thursday, 22 January 2015
Wednesday 21st January, 2015 1615
Considering I am on holiday I have had remarkably little time to sit down and type this diary. Nothing much exciting happening but enough things to keep me occupied pretty much.
Every night bar one since I last made an entry I have cooked for Anna and Joan, the exception being Sunday when I took them and met up with Christina (a girl I met last summer) and we ate at Love in Town. As I stated on my Facebook page, never ever let girls take charge of ordering from a menu. They managed to order fifteen dishes for just the four of us! Joan’s dormitory mates were all asleep when she got back but as soon as she whispered that she had a load of leftovers (and there was a huge amount left) apparently all the lights went on instantly! She showed me the photographs of them all in their pyjamas tucking into their midnight feast. She said they all commented on how lucky they are to have one of my “wives” as their roommate because she is always taking good quality food (either from restaurants or western Wednesdays) back for them. I really hadn’t thought of it that way.
I have introduced Anna to the McBreakfast and taken her twice so far. Both times she has opted for the big breakfast and on the first occasion she was still hungry so I had to order a sausage and egg combo Mcmuffin as well! However, I was appalled to see her spread strawberry jam on the hash browns - it fair turned my stomach. On the second occasion it was no better, she put the jam on the muffin and then proceeded to dump scrambled eggs on top of the jam! When my invitation for dinner at Buckingham Palace arrives, somehow I don’t think I dare take her as my plus one……
I believe yesterday the last exams were taken, certainly when we went on the bus (Joan came too) very early - I had suggested we leave by eight as the exodus would start and the buses would just become enormous suitcases - there were students with luggage setting off for home. Today presumably was worse and tomorrow will be impossible. I was thankful the temperature was reasonably moderate given the time of year, so I rode to town, giving me the chance to do a small shop and run the bike to the repair shop to get a new (well actually I don’t think there was one when I bought the bike) nut for one of the bolts securing the passenger back support. That is now fixed and rather than do any proper cooking tonight (I was going to make a lasagne), instead it will be chicken pieces and chips, nice and simple. I don’t mind cooking but when everything for a week has been from scratch (no ready meals here that I can find other than foul tasting pizzas) it gets very time consuming, hence the lack of a blog lately.
As I am not going anywhere tomorrow I can do the lasagne. There will only be Anna and myself, Joan left at ten this morning and should be home in Suzhou or Chuzhou (I forget which) in about ninety minutes. Once Anna goes home I am certain I am going to miss having them here in the evenings very keenly indeed. That’s despite the fact one tortures me daily and the other drives me to distraction!
Thursday 22nd 2045
Chicken and chips was a disaster. Anna took it upon herself to peel and chop the spuds before I got back with Pepsi. Her intentions were good of course but my dry air fryer is not conducive to French fries, they need to be chunky for them to separate when you toss them during cooking. Never mind, we got up ridiculously early again for a Mcbreakfast and another shop.
Even early, the bus was full of suitcases and indeed when I came back from my evening sojourn two hours ago there were still queues of people with luggage. My hopes of a sort of lie-in tomorrow were dashed when I was told I had to attend a meeting at 0900, which turns out to have been called by the police. It’s their annual visit except they didn’t come last year. Seeing as the meeting starts that early it seems highly unlikely that we will be treated to lunch afterwards. All that has stopped since Beijing issued the no use of public money edict.
Anna leaves for home in the morning too, it’s going to get very quiet around here. I am just wondering when all the local businesses will shut down, leaving me just one watering hole nearby.
Considering I am on holiday I have had remarkably little time to sit down and type this diary. Nothing much exciting happening but enough things to keep me occupied pretty much.
Every night bar one since I last made an entry I have cooked for Anna and Joan, the exception being Sunday when I took them and met up with Christina (a girl I met last summer) and we ate at Love in Town. As I stated on my Facebook page, never ever let girls take charge of ordering from a menu. They managed to order fifteen dishes for just the four of us! Joan’s dormitory mates were all asleep when she got back but as soon as she whispered that she had a load of leftovers (and there was a huge amount left) apparently all the lights went on instantly! She showed me the photographs of them all in their pyjamas tucking into their midnight feast. She said they all commented on how lucky they are to have one of my “wives” as their roommate because she is always taking good quality food (either from restaurants or western Wednesdays) back for them. I really hadn’t thought of it that way.
I have introduced Anna to the McBreakfast and taken her twice so far. Both times she has opted for the big breakfast and on the first occasion she was still hungry so I had to order a sausage and egg combo Mcmuffin as well! However, I was appalled to see her spread strawberry jam on the hash browns - it fair turned my stomach. On the second occasion it was no better, she put the jam on the muffin and then proceeded to dump scrambled eggs on top of the jam! When my invitation for dinner at Buckingham Palace arrives, somehow I don’t think I dare take her as my plus one……
I believe yesterday the last exams were taken, certainly when we went on the bus (Joan came too) very early - I had suggested we leave by eight as the exodus would start and the buses would just become enormous suitcases - there were students with luggage setting off for home. Today presumably was worse and tomorrow will be impossible. I was thankful the temperature was reasonably moderate given the time of year, so I rode to town, giving me the chance to do a small shop and run the bike to the repair shop to get a new (well actually I don’t think there was one when I bought the bike) nut for one of the bolts securing the passenger back support. That is now fixed and rather than do any proper cooking tonight (I was going to make a lasagne), instead it will be chicken pieces and chips, nice and simple. I don’t mind cooking but when everything for a week has been from scratch (no ready meals here that I can find other than foul tasting pizzas) it gets very time consuming, hence the lack of a blog lately.
As I am not going anywhere tomorrow I can do the lasagne. There will only be Anna and myself, Joan left at ten this morning and should be home in Suzhou or Chuzhou (I forget which) in about ninety minutes. Once Anna goes home I am certain I am going to miss having them here in the evenings very keenly indeed. That’s despite the fact one tortures me daily and the other drives me to distraction!
Thursday 22nd 2045
Chicken and chips was a disaster. Anna took it upon herself to peel and chop the spuds before I got back with Pepsi. Her intentions were good of course but my dry air fryer is not conducive to French fries, they need to be chunky for them to separate when you toss them during cooking. Never mind, we got up ridiculously early again for a Mcbreakfast and another shop.
Even early, the bus was full of suitcases and indeed when I came back from my evening sojourn two hours ago there were still queues of people with luggage. My hopes of a sort of lie-in tomorrow were dashed when I was told I had to attend a meeting at 0900, which turns out to have been called by the police. It’s their annual visit except they didn’t come last year. Seeing as the meeting starts that early it seems highly unlikely that we will be treated to lunch afterwards. All that has stopped since Beijing issued the no use of public money edict.
Anna leaves for home in the morning too, it’s going to get very quiet around here. I am just wondering when all the local businesses will shut down, leaving me just one watering hole nearby.
Saturday, 17 January 2015
Thursday 15th January, 2014 1315
Tuesday and Wednesday were miserable, damp days but I nevertheless went to town for breakfast and shopping. Finally this morning our pay turned up in the bank so tonight Yvonne will order my Taobao shopping online to see me through the holidays. Infuriatingly, the speciality laowei food online order firm, from which I was going to order another batch of meat pies, is once again out of stock of the ones I really wanted - beef and bacon. I would imagine that deliveries to the school will cease next Tuesday or Wednesday so if they don’t get any in stock by Sunday I am buggered. I have no idea where the courier firm’s depot is in town so collecting (and a big package to boot) would be problematic.
Ever since the weather turned cold there has been an ongoing tussle between the owners of office number four and we foreigners. They insist on keeping all the doors opened wide, regardless of whether there is an arctic gale howling through the place. As fast as we closed the doors they would open them again.
Last night the camel saw its back broken. It was freezing and I closed the doors. The wife opened them and as she was going to be leaving with a box full of food for delivery to campus, I left them. As she loaded up her bike and mounted it, I got up to close them again but she shouted to her husband to tell me to leave them. Ok, it’s their place and they can do what they want but by the same token it’s my custom to take where I want and I am not paying for the privilege of freezing my nuts off. I finished what will be my last beer there and moved a little further along the street to a place where the doors are closed and they let me bring Pepsi in. not that I am vindictive at all, but they will in future be able to see my bike parked outside the café, rather than theirs. Who knows, maybe they did the same to a student and that is why they had a load of hoax orders the other day?
It’s not raining today although it is cloudy. My cottage pie on Tuesday went down well with the girls and I had bought enough to make two, so tonight will be a repeat. Last night I kept it simple with a carrot, lentil and chilli soup with baguettes. Tomorrow I may make them chicken wings a la Hong Kong. I am also toying with the idea of a macaroni cheese.
Saturday 17th 1800
The best laid plans pf mice and men eh?
Friday’s dinner ended up being pasta with the Bolognese I froze before because I was asked by the small school to come and talk to some prospective female adults who were thinking of improving their English. Time will tell whether they decide to splash out on a course of 48 lessons. I was treated to lunch for my efforts and so had very little appetite in the evening but of course Anna and Joan were hungry as always. The remains of the carrot soup went upstairs to the fourth floor where presumably Kevin finished it off.
Today was the rehearsal for the Chizhou city spring festival gala. It is not what was conveyed to me (not by any stretch of the imagination!) because far from being a party, it is a TV show! Wear formal clothes? Er, no! will I be giving a speech? Will I heck! In fact I won’t be saying a word.
No, what they want is for me and Wolfgang (the owner of the German restaurant here) to perform with a Tai Chi master. Unbelievable. The whole thing may last two minutes (although the show itself may be three hours long). For those unfamiliar with Tai Chi it is basically kung fu in slow motion and to be honest I wish it was full speed because I have stretched muscles today that have lain dormant for decades. I have a feeling I will ache in the morning, parts of me already do. Anna came with me and the dry run took place at the local television studio. The Tai Chi master is about seven feet tall too. We have another rehearsal next Sunday. By way of payment for making a spectacle of myself in front of a live audience of 340 and god knows how many telly viewers, I have been measured up for a traditional tang suit in blue which will be mine to keep afterwards. The tang suit is a traditional Chinese costume which appeared towards the end of the Qing dynasty. Strangely I think I will treasure it.
Having been interviewed/followed by the local TV crews three times now I am no stranger to appearing on their small screen, however I think performing this routine in front of an audience and knowing it will be aired a week later will seem an altogether different matter. It almost seems like taking part in Bruce Forsyth’s Generation Game where the amateurs have to try to replicate what the professional did. I will of course try to get what footage I can from the station and post it on YouTube if I am successful.
Tuesday and Wednesday were miserable, damp days but I nevertheless went to town for breakfast and shopping. Finally this morning our pay turned up in the bank so tonight Yvonne will order my Taobao shopping online to see me through the holidays. Infuriatingly, the speciality laowei food online order firm, from which I was going to order another batch of meat pies, is once again out of stock of the ones I really wanted - beef and bacon. I would imagine that deliveries to the school will cease next Tuesday or Wednesday so if they don’t get any in stock by Sunday I am buggered. I have no idea where the courier firm’s depot is in town so collecting (and a big package to boot) would be problematic.
Ever since the weather turned cold there has been an ongoing tussle between the owners of office number four and we foreigners. They insist on keeping all the doors opened wide, regardless of whether there is an arctic gale howling through the place. As fast as we closed the doors they would open them again.
Last night the camel saw its back broken. It was freezing and I closed the doors. The wife opened them and as she was going to be leaving with a box full of food for delivery to campus, I left them. As she loaded up her bike and mounted it, I got up to close them again but she shouted to her husband to tell me to leave them. Ok, it’s their place and they can do what they want but by the same token it’s my custom to take where I want and I am not paying for the privilege of freezing my nuts off. I finished what will be my last beer there and moved a little further along the street to a place where the doors are closed and they let me bring Pepsi in. not that I am vindictive at all, but they will in future be able to see my bike parked outside the café, rather than theirs. Who knows, maybe they did the same to a student and that is why they had a load of hoax orders the other day?
It’s not raining today although it is cloudy. My cottage pie on Tuesday went down well with the girls and I had bought enough to make two, so tonight will be a repeat. Last night I kept it simple with a carrot, lentil and chilli soup with baguettes. Tomorrow I may make them chicken wings a la Hong Kong. I am also toying with the idea of a macaroni cheese.
Saturday 17th 1800
The best laid plans pf mice and men eh?
Friday’s dinner ended up being pasta with the Bolognese I froze before because I was asked by the small school to come and talk to some prospective female adults who were thinking of improving their English. Time will tell whether they decide to splash out on a course of 48 lessons. I was treated to lunch for my efforts and so had very little appetite in the evening but of course Anna and Joan were hungry as always. The remains of the carrot soup went upstairs to the fourth floor where presumably Kevin finished it off.
Today was the rehearsal for the Chizhou city spring festival gala. It is not what was conveyed to me (not by any stretch of the imagination!) because far from being a party, it is a TV show! Wear formal clothes? Er, no! will I be giving a speech? Will I heck! In fact I won’t be saying a word.
No, what they want is for me and Wolfgang (the owner of the German restaurant here) to perform with a Tai Chi master. Unbelievable. The whole thing may last two minutes (although the show itself may be three hours long). For those unfamiliar with Tai Chi it is basically kung fu in slow motion and to be honest I wish it was full speed because I have stretched muscles today that have lain dormant for decades. I have a feeling I will ache in the morning, parts of me already do. Anna came with me and the dry run took place at the local television studio. The Tai Chi master is about seven feet tall too. We have another rehearsal next Sunday. By way of payment for making a spectacle of myself in front of a live audience of 340 and god knows how many telly viewers, I have been measured up for a traditional tang suit in blue which will be mine to keep afterwards. The tang suit is a traditional Chinese costume which appeared towards the end of the Qing dynasty. Strangely I think I will treasure it.
Having been interviewed/followed by the local TV crews three times now I am no stranger to appearing on their small screen, however I think performing this routine in front of an audience and knowing it will be aired a week later will seem an altogether different matter. It almost seems like taking part in Bruce Forsyth’s Generation Game where the amateurs have to try to replicate what the professional did. I will of course try to get what footage I can from the station and post it on YouTube if I am successful.
Monday, 12 January 2015
Monday 12th January, 2015 0030
Well that was fun.
I posted the last entry and then finally moved my backside to go and do the shower routine. I had a sit down in the bathroom, put toothpaste on the brush and then pzzzzt - electricity gone. I knew I wasn’t running too many appliances for the breaker to trip but nonetheless went outside in my bathrobe to check. Nope, the entire university and surrounds had a blackout. Marvellous. At least it didn’t happen when I had a face full of soap so I am thankful for small mercies.
For a couple of days now Anna has been complaining of toothache. I have given her painkillers but before the power cut she came to me saying the pain was intolerable. My advice was obvious - go to the dentist or the hospital. No, she was too frightened and would go in her hometown after her exams. Great logic, be unable to sleep, have excruciating dental pain and you have a great recipe for academic success. She did however later go to the campus “doctor” (I swear they are street cleaners who don white lab coats) who flogged her some Ibuprofen and told her she had too many teeth and needed to have one taken out to relieve the pain.
Again I told her to go to the dentist and again she refused, despite my reiterating the scenario of constant pain and sleeplessness interfering with her exams. I told her she would get no sympathy from me if she ignored my advice - after all, what could I do besides grab a pair of pliers and dose her up with jing jo? I got her to ring the dentist I have used in the past and she was told they don’t do extractions in the afternoons! Presumably you are only allowed to get toothache in the mornings in China!
After five she finally admitted defeat so I went with her on the number 28 bus and walked half a mile to the number one people’s hospital, the site of my three week sojourn three and a half years ago. We found the dentistry section just before seven only for her to be told the process would take too long and they couldn’t do anything tonight. We struck out there so I got her to call my dentist again and this time they said they would have a look - better than nothing I suppose and so we got a taxi.
It was well after seven when we arrived and at the risk of embarrassing Anna, I have to say she behaved like a small child - absolutely terrified of the dentist. I had my medical card and was quite prepared to pay for whatever procedure she required if only to stem the floodgates. There was ultimately no treatment per se, just something applied to one or two of her teeth to ease the pain and a request to return for the actual treatment.
In the taxi on the way back the truth emerged. She has never been to a dentist in her life and the problem is not that she has too many teeth (as the “campus doctor” stated) but that she has eight - yes eight - cavities that need filling! I suppose the only good thing to come out of this episode is that I also really need some dental work, teeth have been breaking and crowns falling off and therefore the only thing that separates me from Anna is the fact that I don’t actually have toothache, the roots have been burnt out decades before. It has prompted me - that and the fact that I can use my medical card, meaning I won’t actually have to use any of my own cash -to start taking Anna or Joan to interpret when I go and get my mouth sorted and hopefully have some dentures made that I may actually be able to wear. I have never worn the ones I got on the NHS before coming here because they have metal clips on them and were damned uncomfortable. I want ones you just pop in your trap and they stay there, no superglue or Blu-Tak or anything. In fact I will probably go for at least one extraction of a canine that has snapped off at the root during this holiday.
She seems to be relatively pain free now and hopefully it will remain that way for her exams. On our return I showed her how to make a vegetable frittata, something she pronounced tasteless, which of course it is even by western standards but we perked it up with sweet chilli sauce. The problem is, this being China, whenever I teach her how to cook a dish she has to take a picture on her phone at every stage! I am sure our cooking exploits are on display all over Chinese social media sites.
I am off to bed now and will wake early in the hope the salary is in the bank in the morning so I can go for breakfast and buy more food. It is actually quite fun cooking for Anna and Joan - especially when I can get Anna to do all the chopping!
1500
The internet was restored just after nine when the IT department turned up for work. It was too much to expect anyone to come and fix it for the 15,000 inhabitants last night of course.
I left early hoping to have been paid so I could get some cash, go for breakfast and get some shopping. No such luck but at least now I know it is everyone who hasn’t been paid and not just the foreigners which is normally the case. Nothing for it but to rape my UK account, something I don’t like doing because I can’t put it back.
Whilst shopping I decided to replace my trainers. The old ones were getting a bit thin on the sole and I found a pair of fur-lined ones which will do fine for winter as long as they last. I decided dinner for Anna, Joan and I tonight would be simple baguette with luncheon meat, tomato and Branston but if Anna has time tomorrow I will show her how to make cottage pie.
Once back I went to the office and was stunned by the volume of telephone and internet orders being prepared for delivery to campus. At a guess there were seventy and naturally I assumed there was a fair amount of profit being made. At least that was until the wife came back with a huge box containing at least half of what had gone out with her. The hapless husband got both barrels for at least forty minutes. I know not what had happened but it could only have been that he made a monumental cock up (which I doubt) or some students decided it would be rather jolly to have food sent to dormitories that didn’t want it. Whatever the reason, whoever is responsible should have been present to witness the aftermath - I would guess at least two day’s profit was wiped out. If I venture back there tonight in the cold and blustery wind I may try and find a steel helmet for protection.
1900
Had a kip and decided not to go out tonight. It’s still cold and very windy so the extent of my travels tonight will be Pepsi’s walk later.
Well that was fun.
I posted the last entry and then finally moved my backside to go and do the shower routine. I had a sit down in the bathroom, put toothpaste on the brush and then pzzzzt - electricity gone. I knew I wasn’t running too many appliances for the breaker to trip but nonetheless went outside in my bathrobe to check. Nope, the entire university and surrounds had a blackout. Marvellous. At least it didn’t happen when I had a face full of soap so I am thankful for small mercies.
For a couple of days now Anna has been complaining of toothache. I have given her painkillers but before the power cut she came to me saying the pain was intolerable. My advice was obvious - go to the dentist or the hospital. No, she was too frightened and would go in her hometown after her exams. Great logic, be unable to sleep, have excruciating dental pain and you have a great recipe for academic success. She did however later go to the campus “doctor” (I swear they are street cleaners who don white lab coats) who flogged her some Ibuprofen and told her she had too many teeth and needed to have one taken out to relieve the pain.
Again I told her to go to the dentist and again she refused, despite my reiterating the scenario of constant pain and sleeplessness interfering with her exams. I told her she would get no sympathy from me if she ignored my advice - after all, what could I do besides grab a pair of pliers and dose her up with jing jo? I got her to ring the dentist I have used in the past and she was told they don’t do extractions in the afternoons! Presumably you are only allowed to get toothache in the mornings in China!
After five she finally admitted defeat so I went with her on the number 28 bus and walked half a mile to the number one people’s hospital, the site of my three week sojourn three and a half years ago. We found the dentistry section just before seven only for her to be told the process would take too long and they couldn’t do anything tonight. We struck out there so I got her to call my dentist again and this time they said they would have a look - better than nothing I suppose and so we got a taxi.
It was well after seven when we arrived and at the risk of embarrassing Anna, I have to say she behaved like a small child - absolutely terrified of the dentist. I had my medical card and was quite prepared to pay for whatever procedure she required if only to stem the floodgates. There was ultimately no treatment per se, just something applied to one or two of her teeth to ease the pain and a request to return for the actual treatment.
In the taxi on the way back the truth emerged. She has never been to a dentist in her life and the problem is not that she has too many teeth (as the “campus doctor” stated) but that she has eight - yes eight - cavities that need filling! I suppose the only good thing to come out of this episode is that I also really need some dental work, teeth have been breaking and crowns falling off and therefore the only thing that separates me from Anna is the fact that I don’t actually have toothache, the roots have been burnt out decades before. It has prompted me - that and the fact that I can use my medical card, meaning I won’t actually have to use any of my own cash -to start taking Anna or Joan to interpret when I go and get my mouth sorted and hopefully have some dentures made that I may actually be able to wear. I have never worn the ones I got on the NHS before coming here because they have metal clips on them and were damned uncomfortable. I want ones you just pop in your trap and they stay there, no superglue or Blu-Tak or anything. In fact I will probably go for at least one extraction of a canine that has snapped off at the root during this holiday.
She seems to be relatively pain free now and hopefully it will remain that way for her exams. On our return I showed her how to make a vegetable frittata, something she pronounced tasteless, which of course it is even by western standards but we perked it up with sweet chilli sauce. The problem is, this being China, whenever I teach her how to cook a dish she has to take a picture on her phone at every stage! I am sure our cooking exploits are on display all over Chinese social media sites.
I am off to bed now and will wake early in the hope the salary is in the bank in the morning so I can go for breakfast and buy more food. It is actually quite fun cooking for Anna and Joan - especially when I can get Anna to do all the chopping!
1500
The internet was restored just after nine when the IT department turned up for work. It was too much to expect anyone to come and fix it for the 15,000 inhabitants last night of course.
I left early hoping to have been paid so I could get some cash, go for breakfast and get some shopping. No such luck but at least now I know it is everyone who hasn’t been paid and not just the foreigners which is normally the case. Nothing for it but to rape my UK account, something I don’t like doing because I can’t put it back.
Whilst shopping I decided to replace my trainers. The old ones were getting a bit thin on the sole and I found a pair of fur-lined ones which will do fine for winter as long as they last. I decided dinner for Anna, Joan and I tonight would be simple baguette with luncheon meat, tomato and Branston but if Anna has time tomorrow I will show her how to make cottage pie.
Once back I went to the office and was stunned by the volume of telephone and internet orders being prepared for delivery to campus. At a guess there were seventy and naturally I assumed there was a fair amount of profit being made. At least that was until the wife came back with a huge box containing at least half of what had gone out with her. The hapless husband got both barrels for at least forty minutes. I know not what had happened but it could only have been that he made a monumental cock up (which I doubt) or some students decided it would be rather jolly to have food sent to dormitories that didn’t want it. Whatever the reason, whoever is responsible should have been present to witness the aftermath - I would guess at least two day’s profit was wiped out. If I venture back there tonight in the cold and blustery wind I may try and find a steel helmet for protection.
1900
Had a kip and decided not to go out tonight. It’s still cold and very windy so the extent of my travels tonight will be Pepsi’s walk later.
Sunday, 11 January 2015
Thursday 8th January, 2014 1845
Last night was the last western Wednesday of this term and was attended by the three usual foreign suspects accompanied by Maria (Kevin), Charlotte (Ollivier) and Dumpling (me).
It was a fondue more in keeping with those I used to have back in the eighties, using oil and red wine to cook in. All the teachers bought their own meat and all brought far too much - in fact I had that much that I left two steaks in my fridge and still had enough to choke a hippo. Considering our situation I think the dips passed muster, one was shop bought (salsa) and the others were mayonnaise mixed with mustard, ketchup and chilli powder. The garlic bread wasn’t too hot though, even though Ollivier had bought the baguettes that morning I think they were stale even before they went into the baker’s oven. Some salad plus boiled spuds with salad cream made for a nice repast and Kevin had cooked some potato fritters as well. I think he was slightly miffed that I wasn’t keen on having them with a fondue. Ollivier has been working out at the gym for a couple of months, presumably because his wife remarked he was getting a bit porky. Now he’s a beefy sort of lad who you would naturally assume had a bit of grunt about him but after the fondue when the pancakes were being served, besides my maple syrup he produced his father’s home made jams. He couldn’t open one of the jars. He is thirty-five and works out, rides a bike and does all the things expected including eating his five a day like a good boy. The one who opened the jar without too much trouble was Kevin, who will turn sixty in two months!
I think it was nearly ten before the girls left - they always seem to leave en masse - and at that point Kevin departed in anticipation of a Skype call from his father. Quite an amazing chap being able to use a computer given that he is 97 years of age. I stayed long enough to see off the remnants of the bottle of port I produced towards the end and then took Pepsi out into the cold before calling it a day myself.
It was a struggle to lever myself out of bed this morning at six-thirty, in fact it was seven before I groaned my way into my clothes to let the dog out for her morning wee. I was heartily glad when I finished the exams at ten and could come back for a nap. Just an hour but it refreshed me a little for the afternoon set. When I awoke I found an email with a translation of 1100 words they needed by four! Assuming I would be finished by three, I accepted it and later I was well on course to be home by three, let alone finish. That is, until eight more students who had changed major turned up looking to be examined! Unbelievable. I did however manage to do the translation just before four so everyone is happy. I have one more extra tomorrow but she will come early and I will get her out of the way before I start on my own classes. I can only hope there won’t be hordes more students sent to me tomorrow because I am really looking forward to exhaling a huge sigh of relief at noon when I can start my holidays.
Tonight Ollivier and I are going to have another, less elaborate fondue in an attempt to dispose of the meat that was left last night. Joan and Anna are joining us but because they both have evening class it will be nine before we actually start to eat. Far too late for me seeing as I have an early start but of course I can sleep to my heart’s content after I finish tomorrow.
Saturday 10th 1400
Never got around to finishing that entry.
Yesterday I breathed a sigh of relief at noon as I watched my final examinee depart the classroom. No more alarm clocks for seven weeks unless I want to get up early for a McBreakfast or someone has invited me somewhere. All I have to do now is put the scores online and I am done.
Last night Joan and I dined on the last two Aussie pies I had (need to order another 500y worth after Monday’s payday) and then Anna came. She was very late, well after ten, and she asked me if I had anything to eat as she was starving. I had sod all besides frozen sausages so the best I could come up with was cheese and biscuits, which seemed to satisfy her. She won’t go hungry tonight as both she and Joan are joining me for a Bolognese this evening, the makings of which I bought this morning.
However, after Joan left (having completed the nightly torture session which really is yielding fantastic results, wish I had inveigled someone into doing this three years ago) Anna sat watching my computer downloads with me. I made some remark to her which prompted a light punch on my right shoulder (the good one) and I thought nothing of it. Moments later I shifted position and thought to myself that the left arm of my computer chair was a bit sticky. I lifted my arm to see a stream of blood issuing from my forearm. I must have inadvertently picked a small scab (injury doubtless inflicted by a certain baby cat) and as I take aspirin to thin my blood it was in no hurry to congeal.
I showed Anna the gore and said, “Look what you did.” She actually believed she had done it! Gotta love her!
This morning was an early start for breakfast and a shop for the Bolognese. Breakfast done and a jar of pineapple jam left in McDonald’s for future supply problems, I went to RT Mart. On the bus back I suddenly realised my wallet was missing. I couldn’t believe I had lost it twice in such a short space of time when in my entire life I had never lost one before other than in a burglary! The money wasn’t an issue because there was only about 90y in it but again it was the aggravation with the cards and other effects together with the hassle of having to change bank accounts. In China, if you lose your card you don’t get another one, you need to open a new account and that would mean trying to tell the school payroll department to divert the money - and payday is Monday, plus spring festival holidays are looming. Getting a replacement UK debit card would be at least 6 weeks and probably longer given that the school will be deserted until the beginning of March.
Texts were sent to Kevin who very kindly drove me back to town (and was rewarded with a Big Mac for his trouble) when I hoped against hope that all that had happened was that I had missed the bum cheek pocket opening when trying to put the wallet in. I am pleased to say that is precisely what happened and someone was very honest, for customer services had it when we went back. I really don’t want to make it third time unlucky.
Ollivier left this morning for Huimin and a reunion with his wife and children which means I can nick his radiator to keep my guests warm in the spare bedroom and also use his dinner service and table to entertain girls to dinner - a bit like having a little country cottage to use as a retreat!
The weather at the moment is gorgeous with sunshine and figures just into doubles during the day but of course dropping like a stone at night. My prediction of a hard winter may well prove to be erroneous (I certainly hope so) which would make my first bitterly cold, snowbound winter here the exception rather than the norm.
I can’t believe I forgot to mention before that I have been invited to a party on the 11th February. I will be the only foreign teacher here then otherwise perhaps all three of us would have been invited. It is for Chizhou city’s Chinese new year party. I can only assume that the various mayors and dignitaries will be present along with the captains of industry and other masters of the universe (somehow I can’t see Xi Jinping putting in an appearance though) and it would seem I am required to wear formal clothes (that means putting together the mismatched suit or having one made pretty sharpish - there’s a thought!) and there will be a rehearsal some days before. Ever get the feeling I might be required to do the “friends, Chizhouans and countrymen” thing?? I’ll bet I don’t even get to see the TV broadcast either.
Sunday 11th 1230
I really must post this today, it’s becoming an epic.
Last night I showed Anna how to make Bolognese and we, along with Joan, sat down at Ollivier’s table to eat it. There was plenty left for freezing so nobody went to bed hungry. I decided that today I would sleep as long as I wanted but sadly it was the usual round of waking and dozing off then repeating same.
When I did finally rouse myself I checked the internet and when I’d read the world news I decided to get stuck in and enter the student marks on the school website because once done it meant I really am on holiday. The job is a bit of faffing around because it is structured so that they get two marks which average out to give a final score. Admittedly it is a lot easier than previously as before one mark was 70% and another 30% of their total. Now they have changed it to 50/50 so I can just put the same number in twice to achieve the score I want to award, before it was trial and error and took forever. However, 228 of my students and 21 additional ones took me two hours and sent me cross-eyed and now my brain hurts. But it is done so all I need to do today is wash up last night’s dishes and ponder over what to have for dinner tonight. Joan won’t need feeding as she will come after ten but I have very little money in my wallet (payday tomorrow hopefully) and I don’t want to raid my UK account. I reckon I will have to raid the coin jars, which will please wherever I buy the food from!
Last night was the last western Wednesday of this term and was attended by the three usual foreign suspects accompanied by Maria (Kevin), Charlotte (Ollivier) and Dumpling (me).
It was a fondue more in keeping with those I used to have back in the eighties, using oil and red wine to cook in. All the teachers bought their own meat and all brought far too much - in fact I had that much that I left two steaks in my fridge and still had enough to choke a hippo. Considering our situation I think the dips passed muster, one was shop bought (salsa) and the others were mayonnaise mixed with mustard, ketchup and chilli powder. The garlic bread wasn’t too hot though, even though Ollivier had bought the baguettes that morning I think they were stale even before they went into the baker’s oven. Some salad plus boiled spuds with salad cream made for a nice repast and Kevin had cooked some potato fritters as well. I think he was slightly miffed that I wasn’t keen on having them with a fondue. Ollivier has been working out at the gym for a couple of months, presumably because his wife remarked he was getting a bit porky. Now he’s a beefy sort of lad who you would naturally assume had a bit of grunt about him but after the fondue when the pancakes were being served, besides my maple syrup he produced his father’s home made jams. He couldn’t open one of the jars. He is thirty-five and works out, rides a bike and does all the things expected including eating his five a day like a good boy. The one who opened the jar without too much trouble was Kevin, who will turn sixty in two months!
I think it was nearly ten before the girls left - they always seem to leave en masse - and at that point Kevin departed in anticipation of a Skype call from his father. Quite an amazing chap being able to use a computer given that he is 97 years of age. I stayed long enough to see off the remnants of the bottle of port I produced towards the end and then took Pepsi out into the cold before calling it a day myself.
It was a struggle to lever myself out of bed this morning at six-thirty, in fact it was seven before I groaned my way into my clothes to let the dog out for her morning wee. I was heartily glad when I finished the exams at ten and could come back for a nap. Just an hour but it refreshed me a little for the afternoon set. When I awoke I found an email with a translation of 1100 words they needed by four! Assuming I would be finished by three, I accepted it and later I was well on course to be home by three, let alone finish. That is, until eight more students who had changed major turned up looking to be examined! Unbelievable. I did however manage to do the translation just before four so everyone is happy. I have one more extra tomorrow but she will come early and I will get her out of the way before I start on my own classes. I can only hope there won’t be hordes more students sent to me tomorrow because I am really looking forward to exhaling a huge sigh of relief at noon when I can start my holidays.
Tonight Ollivier and I are going to have another, less elaborate fondue in an attempt to dispose of the meat that was left last night. Joan and Anna are joining us but because they both have evening class it will be nine before we actually start to eat. Far too late for me seeing as I have an early start but of course I can sleep to my heart’s content after I finish tomorrow.
Saturday 10th 1400
Never got around to finishing that entry.
Yesterday I breathed a sigh of relief at noon as I watched my final examinee depart the classroom. No more alarm clocks for seven weeks unless I want to get up early for a McBreakfast or someone has invited me somewhere. All I have to do now is put the scores online and I am done.
Last night Joan and I dined on the last two Aussie pies I had (need to order another 500y worth after Monday’s payday) and then Anna came. She was very late, well after ten, and she asked me if I had anything to eat as she was starving. I had sod all besides frozen sausages so the best I could come up with was cheese and biscuits, which seemed to satisfy her. She won’t go hungry tonight as both she and Joan are joining me for a Bolognese this evening, the makings of which I bought this morning.
However, after Joan left (having completed the nightly torture session which really is yielding fantastic results, wish I had inveigled someone into doing this three years ago) Anna sat watching my computer downloads with me. I made some remark to her which prompted a light punch on my right shoulder (the good one) and I thought nothing of it. Moments later I shifted position and thought to myself that the left arm of my computer chair was a bit sticky. I lifted my arm to see a stream of blood issuing from my forearm. I must have inadvertently picked a small scab (injury doubtless inflicted by a certain baby cat) and as I take aspirin to thin my blood it was in no hurry to congeal.
I showed Anna the gore and said, “Look what you did.” She actually believed she had done it! Gotta love her!
This morning was an early start for breakfast and a shop for the Bolognese. Breakfast done and a jar of pineapple jam left in McDonald’s for future supply problems, I went to RT Mart. On the bus back I suddenly realised my wallet was missing. I couldn’t believe I had lost it twice in such a short space of time when in my entire life I had never lost one before other than in a burglary! The money wasn’t an issue because there was only about 90y in it but again it was the aggravation with the cards and other effects together with the hassle of having to change bank accounts. In China, if you lose your card you don’t get another one, you need to open a new account and that would mean trying to tell the school payroll department to divert the money - and payday is Monday, plus spring festival holidays are looming. Getting a replacement UK debit card would be at least 6 weeks and probably longer given that the school will be deserted until the beginning of March.
Texts were sent to Kevin who very kindly drove me back to town (and was rewarded with a Big Mac for his trouble) when I hoped against hope that all that had happened was that I had missed the bum cheek pocket opening when trying to put the wallet in. I am pleased to say that is precisely what happened and someone was very honest, for customer services had it when we went back. I really don’t want to make it third time unlucky.
Ollivier left this morning for Huimin and a reunion with his wife and children which means I can nick his radiator to keep my guests warm in the spare bedroom and also use his dinner service and table to entertain girls to dinner - a bit like having a little country cottage to use as a retreat!
The weather at the moment is gorgeous with sunshine and figures just into doubles during the day but of course dropping like a stone at night. My prediction of a hard winter may well prove to be erroneous (I certainly hope so) which would make my first bitterly cold, snowbound winter here the exception rather than the norm.
I can’t believe I forgot to mention before that I have been invited to a party on the 11th February. I will be the only foreign teacher here then otherwise perhaps all three of us would have been invited. It is for Chizhou city’s Chinese new year party. I can only assume that the various mayors and dignitaries will be present along with the captains of industry and other masters of the universe (somehow I can’t see Xi Jinping putting in an appearance though) and it would seem I am required to wear formal clothes (that means putting together the mismatched suit or having one made pretty sharpish - there’s a thought!) and there will be a rehearsal some days before. Ever get the feeling I might be required to do the “friends, Chizhouans and countrymen” thing?? I’ll bet I don’t even get to see the TV broadcast either.
Sunday 11th 1230
I really must post this today, it’s becoming an epic.
Last night I showed Anna how to make Bolognese and we, along with Joan, sat down at Ollivier’s table to eat it. There was plenty left for freezing so nobody went to bed hungry. I decided that today I would sleep as long as I wanted but sadly it was the usual round of waking and dozing off then repeating same.
When I did finally rouse myself I checked the internet and when I’d read the world news I decided to get stuck in and enter the student marks on the school website because once done it meant I really am on holiday. The job is a bit of faffing around because it is structured so that they get two marks which average out to give a final score. Admittedly it is a lot easier than previously as before one mark was 70% and another 30% of their total. Now they have changed it to 50/50 so I can just put the same number in twice to achieve the score I want to award, before it was trial and error and took forever. However, 228 of my students and 21 additional ones took me two hours and sent me cross-eyed and now my brain hurts. But it is done so all I need to do today is wash up last night’s dishes and ponder over what to have for dinner tonight. Joan won’t need feeding as she will come after ten but I have very little money in my wallet (payday tomorrow hopefully) and I don’t want to raid my UK account. I reckon I will have to raid the coin jars, which will please wherever I buy the food from!
Tuesday, 6 January 2015
Tuesday 6th January, 2015 1145
Sunday was a catch up day to make up for having Friday off, so it saw me examining half each of two classes - the only ones I was able to in the normal way i.e. over two weeks. Afterwards I went to the office to relax and meet Anna who had requested it as she had many questions.
What I didn’t know was that the majority of them related to my blog! She has a small notebook in which she writes words or phrases she doesn’t understand when she watches a film or reads something. Then she tries to find meanings online but is not always successful. She was particularly unsuccessful in a lot from my last entry! I have no idea what films she has been watching but one of the things she asked me about that she had heard in one rather discomfited me - unbeknown to me she had already asked Kevin and he had said to ask me! Suffice to say it was what they call that thing that sometimes accidentally happens nocturnally to young males.
Yesterday was tiring mentally. I had no option other than to test a class in one hit. Luckily they never had lessons after lunch so we had agreed we would continue until finished. I started at 0930 and finally finished at 1300 by virtue of not taking a break. It was made longer by seven additional students who are about to graduate and needed a pass mark from me in order to be able to do so. Why this wasn’t done for them three years ago when it should have been is beyond me. How am I supposed to gauge from their level now what it was four years ago?
Any ideas I may have had of going out yesterday evening evaporated when I checked my inbox and found a large task sitting there which needed to be done before nine this morning. Certainly I could have started it and left some, got up early and finished it but I much prefer to start and finish these things in one sitting. It did numb my brain however, for it was all in scientific language and concerned illegal toxic dumping into a large lake in another province so there was plenty of water analysis and chemical reactions etc. That was finished just before 2100, at which time Joan came for her nightly visit. Luckily I still had some chilli which I had taken out of the freezer. I put some jacket potatoes in the oven and was annoyed on finding, after dishing up, that they still weren’t cooked after two hours. I wish I had used the microwave now - twenty minutes tops.
Last night’s was the most painful so far with Joan but it is very noticeable now that certain movements (even though I can’t perform them fully myself yet) are virtually pain-free after a fortnight of this. The clicking and crepitation has also decreased markedly although there is one manoeuvre which is still agony so that’s the one we are concentrating more on. I can’t expect miracles but am confident this is working - after all, it was eighteen months before full mobility returned after rotator cuff surgery prior to coming here.
We were supposed to have a dusting of snow late last night and throughout today but so far thankfully it has only manifested itself as light rain. This afternoon and tomorrow I am also working on the exams, doing the first halves of the Thursday classes and doubtless polishing off the rest of those who changed major. On Friday lunch, bar entering the marks on the system, I will be finished for seven weeks for the spring festival. I think the mass exodus from campus commences on the 19th and it will be interesting to see how many teachers remain on campus this year. For the first time last year I was not the sole faculty member in residence, something I attribute to the new housing which is actually comfortable in winter rather than being frostbite-inducing!
1900
After I finished this afternoon I took the bus to town to buy salad for tomorrow’s fondue. Annoyingly, when I got to McDonald’s for my dinner I suddenly realised I had forgotten to buy potatoes. I want to make a sort of potato salad (using that ambrosia - Heinz salad cream) to go with the salad. Halfway through what passes for a meal there Kevin popped in on his way to teach in town. Even better, he is going shopping afterwards so as long as I send a reminder we should have spuds tomorrow night. Even better I could give him my shopping to bring back later although stupidly I forgot the bag of kidneys I bought for the pets’ dinner. They still have kidneys but they are slowly thawing at the moment in a pot on low heat.
I now have the latest video of my life. Longer than the last one at forty-five minutes, I have to say it is nowhere near as good as the first and is decidedly amateurish and the sound is all over the place. The only thing I like about it is that five of my favourite girls are in it : Yvonne, Joan, Anna, Carol and Nancy. As for the rest, well it dwells far too long on certain events (given they completely cut out the children’s party), my face which appears miserable behind the fake beard and probably I should have simply refused them filming rights at that particular time. You may recall I felt awful over Christmas, at one point almost completely losing my voice. I also looked like death. This is all evident in it and no more so than the last section. This was filmed after a very long day having been busy in town in the day and then returning to play Santa for the kids. I had partaken of a few medicinal libations and at the finish went to McDonalds across the road for some food. I felt terrible and needed my bed badly but also needed to eat and to feed Nancy who I had taken as my guest. I can’t believe they included that part and you may conclude correctly that I had no editorial say in the production - unlike the last one which personally I think is a very professional effort, no credit to me.
Ho hum, at least I have more memories to watch in my dotage. It is currently uploading to You Tube (and has been for 24 hours so far) although whether I will provide the link? The jury is still out I am afraid.
Sunday was a catch up day to make up for having Friday off, so it saw me examining half each of two classes - the only ones I was able to in the normal way i.e. over two weeks. Afterwards I went to the office to relax and meet Anna who had requested it as she had many questions.
What I didn’t know was that the majority of them related to my blog! She has a small notebook in which she writes words or phrases she doesn’t understand when she watches a film or reads something. Then she tries to find meanings online but is not always successful. She was particularly unsuccessful in a lot from my last entry! I have no idea what films she has been watching but one of the things she asked me about that she had heard in one rather discomfited me - unbeknown to me she had already asked Kevin and he had said to ask me! Suffice to say it was what they call that thing that sometimes accidentally happens nocturnally to young males.
Yesterday was tiring mentally. I had no option other than to test a class in one hit. Luckily they never had lessons after lunch so we had agreed we would continue until finished. I started at 0930 and finally finished at 1300 by virtue of not taking a break. It was made longer by seven additional students who are about to graduate and needed a pass mark from me in order to be able to do so. Why this wasn’t done for them three years ago when it should have been is beyond me. How am I supposed to gauge from their level now what it was four years ago?
Any ideas I may have had of going out yesterday evening evaporated when I checked my inbox and found a large task sitting there which needed to be done before nine this morning. Certainly I could have started it and left some, got up early and finished it but I much prefer to start and finish these things in one sitting. It did numb my brain however, for it was all in scientific language and concerned illegal toxic dumping into a large lake in another province so there was plenty of water analysis and chemical reactions etc. That was finished just before 2100, at which time Joan came for her nightly visit. Luckily I still had some chilli which I had taken out of the freezer. I put some jacket potatoes in the oven and was annoyed on finding, after dishing up, that they still weren’t cooked after two hours. I wish I had used the microwave now - twenty minutes tops.
Last night’s was the most painful so far with Joan but it is very noticeable now that certain movements (even though I can’t perform them fully myself yet) are virtually pain-free after a fortnight of this. The clicking and crepitation has also decreased markedly although there is one manoeuvre which is still agony so that’s the one we are concentrating more on. I can’t expect miracles but am confident this is working - after all, it was eighteen months before full mobility returned after rotator cuff surgery prior to coming here.
We were supposed to have a dusting of snow late last night and throughout today but so far thankfully it has only manifested itself as light rain. This afternoon and tomorrow I am also working on the exams, doing the first halves of the Thursday classes and doubtless polishing off the rest of those who changed major. On Friday lunch, bar entering the marks on the system, I will be finished for seven weeks for the spring festival. I think the mass exodus from campus commences on the 19th and it will be interesting to see how many teachers remain on campus this year. For the first time last year I was not the sole faculty member in residence, something I attribute to the new housing which is actually comfortable in winter rather than being frostbite-inducing!
1900
After I finished this afternoon I took the bus to town to buy salad for tomorrow’s fondue. Annoyingly, when I got to McDonald’s for my dinner I suddenly realised I had forgotten to buy potatoes. I want to make a sort of potato salad (using that ambrosia - Heinz salad cream) to go with the salad. Halfway through what passes for a meal there Kevin popped in on his way to teach in town. Even better, he is going shopping afterwards so as long as I send a reminder we should have spuds tomorrow night. Even better I could give him my shopping to bring back later although stupidly I forgot the bag of kidneys I bought for the pets’ dinner. They still have kidneys but they are slowly thawing at the moment in a pot on low heat.
I now have the latest video of my life. Longer than the last one at forty-five minutes, I have to say it is nowhere near as good as the first and is decidedly amateurish and the sound is all over the place. The only thing I like about it is that five of my favourite girls are in it : Yvonne, Joan, Anna, Carol and Nancy. As for the rest, well it dwells far too long on certain events (given they completely cut out the children’s party), my face which appears miserable behind the fake beard and probably I should have simply refused them filming rights at that particular time. You may recall I felt awful over Christmas, at one point almost completely losing my voice. I also looked like death. This is all evident in it and no more so than the last section. This was filmed after a very long day having been busy in town in the day and then returning to play Santa for the kids. I had partaken of a few medicinal libations and at the finish went to McDonalds across the road for some food. I felt terrible and needed my bed badly but also needed to eat and to feed Nancy who I had taken as my guest. I can’t believe they included that part and you may conclude correctly that I had no editorial say in the production - unlike the last one which personally I think is a very professional effort, no credit to me.
Ho hum, at least I have more memories to watch in my dotage. It is currently uploading to You Tube (and has been for 24 hours so far) although whether I will provide the link? The jury is still out I am afraid.
Saturday, 3 January 2015
Friday 2nd January, 2015 1600
Well last night Joan came, she really is diligent in her quest to sort my shoulder - either that or she has a sadistic streak! For her pains she gets to watch English telly and usually supper so last night I decided to make a big plate of chips, knowing she would never have had them before.
I have a 2.5 hour film we could have watched but she came too late so it was two episodes of Wallander instead - from the size of the mobile phones it is circa mid-eighties. Thinking the plot was just the two episodes, I was rather miffed when we never found out who murdered the geriatrics and am currently downloading the next two episodes - doubtless it will be at least another two before all is revealed. I just hope Joan is still here at the conclusion and hasn‘t left for her holidays!
I got up early this morning to go on my regular breakfast/shopping run. We are having the first western Wednesday of 2015 (and the last of this term) next week and it is to be a wine fondue with meat. I have suggested we all buy our own meat for ourselves and our partners, that way nobody shoulders all the cost but I have taken it upon myself to prepare garlic bread (can’t trust a Frenchman to do that!), dips (heaven only knows if mixing chilli powder and mustard with mayonnaise will work but we will find out) and salad as accompaniments. Ollivier is not allowed to do salad any more after the last time when he virtually minced everything so you had to eat all or nothing. I prefer the English way with big chunks.
As I am currently bussing it I don’t want to carry heavy bags so I will make a repeat trip tomorrow and then again on Tuesday after class to get the salad so it’s fresh.
Anyway, when I got to the bus I saw people already on board but the doors were closed. A man, boy and two girls were waiting patiently in the cold for the driver to finish rinsing his mop outside the south gate security building. I said to the lad that if he pushed the button inside the flap beside the door the doors would open and he nodded but continued waiting. Thirty seconds later I thought to hell with this, I want a seat and some warmth, opened the flap and hit the button. With a dramatic hiss the doors opened, producing mixed reactions of astonishment and awe from my fellow queuees. They appeared indecisive as to whether it was “allowed” to get on (if the doors are open and there’s no driver it is a trust thing and everyone puts their money in the machine anyway) so I herded them aboard to much muttering which can only have been along the lines of my God, I can’t believe he just did that! I half expected the driver to return and demand to know who had the audacity and I was quite prepared to put my hand up - there are certain perks to being a laowei after all, but he never batted an eyelid, this being China.
In McDonald’s the pretty girl I like to see has now learnt two English words from me - big and breakfast. I am going to try and teach her enough that she doesn’t need to get the picture card in dual language print out every time I go there so tomorrow we may work on sausage and egg McMuffin!
The charging socket on my four year old Lenovo 400y phone has now collapsed inside the casing and the only way now to charge the battery is by using a universal charger. That would involve removing the battery completely every time I want to charge, with the result of my being incommunicado and no alarm clock in the morning if I do it overnight. I don’t want to splash out on a new phone just yet so I have dug out my English Nokia and charged it up. I have forgotten how to work it after all this time but I am sure I will cope, the only problem is that it won’t accept Chinese characters so addresses to show cab drivers are out for the foreseeable future.
I should put a sign up outside my door saying “shower and laundry house” seeing as Anna is coming for both later and Joan is coming for a shower at seven. I don’t mind, I have offered these things to them and they both have keys if I am not here.
Saturday 3rd 1500
In the event Joan never tool a shower but we managed to watch the long film and even had just enough time to watch the London new year fireworks afterwards before my physio. I made steak and onion baguettes for us both, using what looked like (and cost appropriately) nice pieces of steak, albeit completely trimmed and rectangular. You rarely see a steak that looks like one in China. Anyway, suffice to say Pepsi was treated to four lumps of industrial fireproof carpet masquerading as beef shortly after we started to tuck (or struggle!) in. I think had I put the meat in a stew and simmered it for four hours I may have produced something chewable but I think the only way to get a proper steak here is to buy online at huge expense and get imported Australian stuff. Never again.
This morning Joan came for breakfast with me and lo and behold, they had run out of strawberry jam again and substituted ketchup of all things. I am probably their most regular customer so it shouldn’t be beyond them to warn me so that I can order something else but of course TIC (this is China). I now have a jar of pineapple jam - couldn’t find marmalade today - which I will take the next time I go and request they keep it there for me in case of any recurrence.
We went to RT Mart and I used the loyalty card I now have, courtesy of Joan. She is so sweet and thoughtful, I have never known anyone quite like her. She knew I never had my own card only because it came up one day and I said my ID number (being a foreign expert certificate) didn’t compute with the supermarkets. She made a special trip unbeknown to me just to get a card using her own ID. She does so much for me without my asking (including torturing me which I did request) that sometimes I feel simply feeding her suppers is nowhere near enough. Given that I am almost treble her age it makes it all the more extraordinary. And no, it will make no difference to her marks in the exam tomorrow morning!
When we got back I dropped her off at her dorm block and picked up Pepsi for our customary couple of beers in the office and on the way down encountered Ollivier cycling in the opposite direction with earphones firmly wedged in his ears and no doubt some awful French music belting out. I suggested he turn back and come with us (he had also been shopping in town) and he did so. That lad has loads of willpower, he just has very little won’t power.
Now it is siesta time, Joan hopefully has no evening class and we can watch episodes three and four of Wallander (he still hasn’t found the killer) and enjoy bacon and cheese baguettes, at least I know it won’t be as tough as army issue boots.
Well last night Joan came, she really is diligent in her quest to sort my shoulder - either that or she has a sadistic streak! For her pains she gets to watch English telly and usually supper so last night I decided to make a big plate of chips, knowing she would never have had them before.
I have a 2.5 hour film we could have watched but she came too late so it was two episodes of Wallander instead - from the size of the mobile phones it is circa mid-eighties. Thinking the plot was just the two episodes, I was rather miffed when we never found out who murdered the geriatrics and am currently downloading the next two episodes - doubtless it will be at least another two before all is revealed. I just hope Joan is still here at the conclusion and hasn‘t left for her holidays!
I got up early this morning to go on my regular breakfast/shopping run. We are having the first western Wednesday of 2015 (and the last of this term) next week and it is to be a wine fondue with meat. I have suggested we all buy our own meat for ourselves and our partners, that way nobody shoulders all the cost but I have taken it upon myself to prepare garlic bread (can’t trust a Frenchman to do that!), dips (heaven only knows if mixing chilli powder and mustard with mayonnaise will work but we will find out) and salad as accompaniments. Ollivier is not allowed to do salad any more after the last time when he virtually minced everything so you had to eat all or nothing. I prefer the English way with big chunks.
As I am currently bussing it I don’t want to carry heavy bags so I will make a repeat trip tomorrow and then again on Tuesday after class to get the salad so it’s fresh.
Anyway, when I got to the bus I saw people already on board but the doors were closed. A man, boy and two girls were waiting patiently in the cold for the driver to finish rinsing his mop outside the south gate security building. I said to the lad that if he pushed the button inside the flap beside the door the doors would open and he nodded but continued waiting. Thirty seconds later I thought to hell with this, I want a seat and some warmth, opened the flap and hit the button. With a dramatic hiss the doors opened, producing mixed reactions of astonishment and awe from my fellow queuees. They appeared indecisive as to whether it was “allowed” to get on (if the doors are open and there’s no driver it is a trust thing and everyone puts their money in the machine anyway) so I herded them aboard to much muttering which can only have been along the lines of my God, I can’t believe he just did that! I half expected the driver to return and demand to know who had the audacity and I was quite prepared to put my hand up - there are certain perks to being a laowei after all, but he never batted an eyelid, this being China.
In McDonald’s the pretty girl I like to see has now learnt two English words from me - big and breakfast. I am going to try and teach her enough that she doesn’t need to get the picture card in dual language print out every time I go there so tomorrow we may work on sausage and egg McMuffin!
The charging socket on my four year old Lenovo 400y phone has now collapsed inside the casing and the only way now to charge the battery is by using a universal charger. That would involve removing the battery completely every time I want to charge, with the result of my being incommunicado and no alarm clock in the morning if I do it overnight. I don’t want to splash out on a new phone just yet so I have dug out my English Nokia and charged it up. I have forgotten how to work it after all this time but I am sure I will cope, the only problem is that it won’t accept Chinese characters so addresses to show cab drivers are out for the foreseeable future.
I should put a sign up outside my door saying “shower and laundry house” seeing as Anna is coming for both later and Joan is coming for a shower at seven. I don’t mind, I have offered these things to them and they both have keys if I am not here.
Saturday 3rd 1500
In the event Joan never tool a shower but we managed to watch the long film and even had just enough time to watch the London new year fireworks afterwards before my physio. I made steak and onion baguettes for us both, using what looked like (and cost appropriately) nice pieces of steak, albeit completely trimmed and rectangular. You rarely see a steak that looks like one in China. Anyway, suffice to say Pepsi was treated to four lumps of industrial fireproof carpet masquerading as beef shortly after we started to tuck (or struggle!) in. I think had I put the meat in a stew and simmered it for four hours I may have produced something chewable but I think the only way to get a proper steak here is to buy online at huge expense and get imported Australian stuff. Never again.
This morning Joan came for breakfast with me and lo and behold, they had run out of strawberry jam again and substituted ketchup of all things. I am probably their most regular customer so it shouldn’t be beyond them to warn me so that I can order something else but of course TIC (this is China). I now have a jar of pineapple jam - couldn’t find marmalade today - which I will take the next time I go and request they keep it there for me in case of any recurrence.
We went to RT Mart and I used the loyalty card I now have, courtesy of Joan. She is so sweet and thoughtful, I have never known anyone quite like her. She knew I never had my own card only because it came up one day and I said my ID number (being a foreign expert certificate) didn’t compute with the supermarkets. She made a special trip unbeknown to me just to get a card using her own ID. She does so much for me without my asking (including torturing me which I did request) that sometimes I feel simply feeding her suppers is nowhere near enough. Given that I am almost treble her age it makes it all the more extraordinary. And no, it will make no difference to her marks in the exam tomorrow morning!
When we got back I dropped her off at her dorm block and picked up Pepsi for our customary couple of beers in the office and on the way down encountered Ollivier cycling in the opposite direction with earphones firmly wedged in his ears and no doubt some awful French music belting out. I suggested he turn back and come with us (he had also been shopping in town) and he did so. That lad has loads of willpower, he just has very little won’t power.
Now it is siesta time, Joan hopefully has no evening class and we can watch episodes three and four of Wallander (he still hasn’t found the killer) and enjoy bacon and cheese baguettes, at least I know it won’t be as tough as army issue boots.
Thursday, 1 January 2015
New years day 2015 1230
I had always intended to have a sleep before going out for the party but just when I was seriously considering sliding under the quilt somebody, somewhere in the building, decided to start using a hammer. The construction of the block is such that the sound could have been coming from anywhere, quite possibly not even from within our section. Annoyed, I waited for it to stop, which eventually it did.
Still enough time for a respectable kip. I laid down and waited for unconsciousness. Then one of the cats decided to start talking to anyone who would listen. Frustrated, I buried my head and hoped. I think in the end I managed just over half an hour. I could have had longer but I had arranged with Ollivier that we would go to McDonald’s for a bite before the party. We rendezvoused at south gate at 2030 and caught the bus. Regular readers will know that any event or outing I attend here in China always has some drama or other attached and this was no exception. I said to Ollivier, being younger than me, to go on ahead of me and try to bag seats at the rear of the bus. No sooner had he boarded than I watched in disbelief as the doors closed and the bus started to move off! It wouldn’t have been a catastrophe as I could have taken the next one but between the pair of us we got it stopped and I got on.
I ate some nuggets whilst Ollivier polished off a German sausage burger, his large fries, MY large fries and two apple pies. That boy can eat. With time to kill before our 2200 assignation at Phebe bar I suggested we find somewhere to sit and have a beer. Whilst I had jing jo medicine wine with me, you can’t smoke in McDonald’s.
When Linda got to the bar she called me and we walked up to New West Street (where Love In Town is) and walked up the escalators, which annoyingly weren’t working. We found the entrance locked. Trying to tell Linda where we were and what the problem was proved impossible so eventually I shouted through a small hole in the door and banged on it for them to open up. A stream of Chinese came back and so I simply said “English!”. It’s a great key for opening doors here!
Once inside it was clear there would be no conversation that night. It was a typical Chinese bar with the music ramped up so loud that the bass thumped your stomach. I don’t think I would be far wrong in saying I was probably the oldest in the packed nightclub by a decade. There was some consolation in that there were scantily clad dancing girls for our entertainment and Linda and Co kept us supplied with bottles of beer. The DJ, to use modern parlance, sucked. With the amount of jabbering he kept up constantly there may as well have been no music. There was one “strongman” act in which at one point he used hypodermic needles to puncture his cheek from inside his mouth (at that point I decided it was a good time to visit the loo), he blew up a car inner tube with people standing on it and at the end downed half a dozen bottles of beer in rapid succession. The staff also insisted Ollivier and I join the public dancing on a spring-mounted stage. Needless to say with two fat lumps added it got decidedly bouncier and today my ankles are telling me all about it.
All in all it was a very different new year to any I have had before. On a final note, when we arrived back at south gate in the taxi Ollivier said he had either left his scarf in the bar or lost it somewhere, maybe in the taxi. Ten minutes ago he sent me a message saying he hadn’t lost it, he was that drunk he didn’t realise it was around his neck!
I had always intended to have a sleep before going out for the party but just when I was seriously considering sliding under the quilt somebody, somewhere in the building, decided to start using a hammer. The construction of the block is such that the sound could have been coming from anywhere, quite possibly not even from within our section. Annoyed, I waited for it to stop, which eventually it did.
Still enough time for a respectable kip. I laid down and waited for unconsciousness. Then one of the cats decided to start talking to anyone who would listen. Frustrated, I buried my head and hoped. I think in the end I managed just over half an hour. I could have had longer but I had arranged with Ollivier that we would go to McDonald’s for a bite before the party. We rendezvoused at south gate at 2030 and caught the bus. Regular readers will know that any event or outing I attend here in China always has some drama or other attached and this was no exception. I said to Ollivier, being younger than me, to go on ahead of me and try to bag seats at the rear of the bus. No sooner had he boarded than I watched in disbelief as the doors closed and the bus started to move off! It wouldn’t have been a catastrophe as I could have taken the next one but between the pair of us we got it stopped and I got on.
I ate some nuggets whilst Ollivier polished off a German sausage burger, his large fries, MY large fries and two apple pies. That boy can eat. With time to kill before our 2200 assignation at Phebe bar I suggested we find somewhere to sit and have a beer. Whilst I had jing jo medicine wine with me, you can’t smoke in McDonald’s.
When Linda got to the bar she called me and we walked up to New West Street (where Love In Town is) and walked up the escalators, which annoyingly weren’t working. We found the entrance locked. Trying to tell Linda where we were and what the problem was proved impossible so eventually I shouted through a small hole in the door and banged on it for them to open up. A stream of Chinese came back and so I simply said “English!”. It’s a great key for opening doors here!
Once inside it was clear there would be no conversation that night. It was a typical Chinese bar with the music ramped up so loud that the bass thumped your stomach. I don’t think I would be far wrong in saying I was probably the oldest in the packed nightclub by a decade. There was some consolation in that there were scantily clad dancing girls for our entertainment and Linda and Co kept us supplied with bottles of beer. The DJ, to use modern parlance, sucked. With the amount of jabbering he kept up constantly there may as well have been no music. There was one “strongman” act in which at one point he used hypodermic needles to puncture his cheek from inside his mouth (at that point I decided it was a good time to visit the loo), he blew up a car inner tube with people standing on it and at the end downed half a dozen bottles of beer in rapid succession. The staff also insisted Ollivier and I join the public dancing on a spring-mounted stage. Needless to say with two fat lumps added it got decidedly bouncier and today my ankles are telling me all about it.
All in all it was a very different new year to any I have had before. On a final note, when we arrived back at south gate in the taxi Ollivier said he had either left his scarf in the bar or lost it somewhere, maybe in the taxi. Ten minutes ago he sent me a message saying he hadn’t lost it, he was that drunk he didn’t realise it was around his neck!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)