Sunday 11^th February, 2018 1930

Naturally I stayed up until the small hours watching England. Having already decided to do a mega-shop tomorrow there was nothing to get up for although I had fleeting notions of making myself a roast dinner.

Apathy overcame me and as time passed going out for dinner receded as did cooking, finally I decided to have a look in the little supermarket to see if I could find some frozen meat jaozi (dumplings) or failing that I was going to settle for a couple of packets of dried fish/squid.

When I finally moved my lazy bones I was horrified to discover the little supermarket was all shuttered down. As I can't recall them shutting completely last year, I have no idea whether they are simply operating reduced hours or not. Suddenly I was faced with using the noodle restaurant or starving. I spotted a tiny shop opposite and went in search of dried fish – stinks to high heaven but I have developed quite a taste for it (as long as I have toothpicks handy).

They had none, so I started looking for cakes and biscuits I could actually eat, I would have made my daily subsistence from that – after popping an extra Metformin tablet. Then I spotted something.

Lazy Hotpot. Never heard of it. I took a look, there were two types; one with fiery chilli pictures and one without. Quite heavy at about a pound in weight. The small print was too small and in red against a black background so without magnification I couldn't read it. I did however discern the instructions were also in English. I parted with 27y and came home.

Great. No need for an oven or microwave. All you need is cold water. I followed the directions, putting rice in one compartment and everything else in the larger one, poured water on the food then put the heating bag in the bottom before covering that in water. Reseal, sit back and wait fifteen minutes.

Well that bag is so effective it had the water boiling rapidly, fiercely enough for me to move the container to the windowsill in case it burnt my computer desk.

Sadly the food itself was terrible. I didn't know what half of it was and with the space available it wasn't possible to submerge all of it, resulting in very crispy lotus root and other unidentifiable morsels. The noodles and rice were cooked well though! The broth was far too spicy for me (and remember I shunned the hot one!) so I didn't enjoy it at all. I am still burping up dragon breath.

It did occur to me what a terrific idea it would be though if applied to a pot curry, sweet and sour or chop suey. Perfect to take to work, on a picnic, hiking (not that I do) etc – all you need is cold water. I'd take one a week for when I am marooned on the 7^th floor were they edible. I mean, I have seen gel packs for warming hands but never a mini-sack that boils water when immersed. I wonder if the army has similar for manoeuvres?