Monday 3^rd May, 2021 1800

Today is what would have been my Mother's 88^th birthday. Two fat ladies as the bingo caller would say. I wouldn't have mentioned here that my Mum was in fact two fat ladies rolled into one but for the fact were I able to speak to her that's exactly what I would have told her. She'd have called me a cheeky sod but only between guffaws.

So lunch today was a surprise in more ways than one. Firstly Adriana's 16 year old spoilt rich kid little empress student decided to have a spat with her mother and cut her nose off to spite her face by not joining us. Her loss, not in the materialistic sense because she is draped in Gucci and Armani because the folks are stinking rich but she may just have learnt something about life today. I couldn't care less about her, she refuses even to adopt an English name. Her Chinese name is Yuanyuan – moneymoney. Says it all I suppose but the parents are now reaping the rewards and being Chinese will probably ensure she has a huge monthly allowance possibly for the rest of her life. But she won't learn about life. And I never had to pay for her lunch.

Anyway, another surprise was going upstairs in the mall. I have only ever been to the ground floor for Burger King and then down for Metro. Ok I said, let's have Korean? Twenty one people waiting ahead of us so an estimated hour wait. Adriana had to leave by 1420 so that wasn't on. Ok, let's try the crab restaurant. Forty minutes to wait!

Granted, it's a holiday but not that big a one. She suggested hotpot or a chicken place. I didn't fancy either. What about the Japanese place? I think that's expensive. Bugger it, let's check it out.

No waiting time, straight in, by virtue of the prices! 298¥ a head but all you can eat and drink within two hours of your first food being delivered. So bang went 600¥ from my war chest for what I thought was an extortionate amount. Our man in Shanghai will laugh because our meals there are 1.000-3000¥ a time but hey - I am in the allegedly poorest Chinese province.

But what the hell, we'd gone for lunch and lunch we would have.

It is one of the darkest restaurants I have ever been in. The décor is all black but there is individual table lighting. You can choose whatever you want from the menu as long as it isn't on the 398¥ ticket (which to be quite honest is a waste of an extra hundred a head, there's plenty of choice) and we did. The waiter did explain to Adriana that the dishes were “delicate and minimal” (meaning I assume nouvelle cuisine) so she ordered bucketloads.

I have a small appetite at the best of times but having eaten nothing since the Starbucks breakfast yesterday I felt ready. So ready that when the first wave of food was finished we ordered reinforcements! Not all the dishes were great but most of them were. When we parted company I had intended to go to Metro to buy croissants but I was so full I just tottered off to get a taxi before my hip collapsed from under me!

I will definitely be going back there, maybe as early as next Sunday, with Jody.