Monday 5th December, 2016                         1630

The big bus with the safe driver was back this morning. That doesn’t of course mean that the journeys are without incident - this IS China, after all. On the cut-through from the Anning Road (which carries the BRT and runs past my home and onwards the other way to BHG) to the main road which follows the Yellow River, I noticed from my seat in the back row of the bus that some idiot astern was overtaking everything.

Nothing particularly wrong with that, except when you are on the other side of the road and there is oncoming traffic. I rather naively expected the car to brake and pull in behind our bus. He didn’t. There was going to be a head-on collision, without doubt.

Well there would have been but for the vigilance of our driver, who spotted what was happening in his side mirror and who braked sharply enough to send everyone’s things hurtling towards the front and very nearly me with them seeing as I was sat in the middle with no seat back in front of me to stop me!

The idiot managed to scrape in front of the bus and miss the oncoming car by a whisker, producing involuntary seafaring expressions from me as he did so. That chap quite possibly owes his life to our man.

The first period today went exactly the way I like my lessons to go. One of the students was relating how he was up until 0230 watching e-sports. For those who haven’t the foggiest what e-sports are, it’s where teams play each other at computer games. This particular competition attracted a $3million prize so as you may guess, it is big business and is extremely popular in Asia - and I am told the USA and Canada.

I opined that not only were computer games precisely that, games and not sports, I could not imagine how anyone could possibly find watching others play them entertaining when they can play them themselves. Talk about light blue touchpaper and stand well clear! The next thirty minutes absolutely flew by and at the end the boys were steamed up. Unless you know the Chinese way you would never know but I have been here long enough to realise I had wound them up good and proper!

When I called a halt for the break and for them all to rush out and buy their breakfasts (they never get up early enough to be able to stop and get them en route to class) I pointed out to them that this was how EVERY class should be. Finally I had found something which could invoke their passion for once and again just for once, I didn’t have to do all the talking. Just maybe they got my meaning and will at least for what remains of their time with me, start engaging in debate - heated or not. I am perfectly happy to argue black is white for the purpose!

Suzy brought the rest of my Taobao shopping in for me but neglected to either bring a bag or tell me to bring one with me so I ended up with two little breakfast bags to tote it home. Of course Monday is now shopping day, so rather than take it to the flat and then walk back to the BRT I took it to the supermarket.

Not one item I had is sold by BHG (otherwise I would buy it there!) but I was accosted on entering. I knew what they wanted - for me to put it in a locker before entry. To be honest, I find the staff there to be thoroughly objectionable for the most part (not just the vegetable virago) so I decided to play the dumb foreigner. I showed them the labels from Taobao as I have done once before and been allowed to go through. Not on this occasion.

I simply lifted the bags, handed them to the woman and snapped “Here!”,  strolled off with my trolley and went shopping. In fact I went shopping so much it cost me 320y (8 bottles of plonk making up 40% of that) and when I left I went to retrieve my Taobao stuff. She had kept it on her lectern and when she gave it to me I brandished the receipt from the till and asked if she wanted to check the four bags I had. She declined.

After unpacking the shopping I went to see if my bank card had arrived. It hadn’t but they tried to give me a parcel addressed to Jacob. No, what I would do is text him to alert him that it was there but in the meantime could I borrow a pen and paper. If the parcel actually got here then THAT is the address to use! It seems I get a different address from whoever I ask because it’s nothing like the one I gave my bank! If at first you don’t succeed…..