Friday 2nd January, 2015               1600

Well last night Joan came, she really is diligent in her quest to sort my shoulder - either that or she has a sadistic streak! For her pains she gets to watch English telly and usually supper so last night I decided to make a big plate of chips, knowing she would never have had them before.

I have a 2.5 hour film we could have watched but she came too late so it was two episodes of Wallander instead - from the size of the mobile phones it is circa mid-eighties. Thinking the plot was just the two episodes, I was rather miffed when we never found out who murdered the geriatrics and am currently downloading the next two episodes - doubtless it will be at least another two before all is revealed. I just hope Joan is still here at the conclusion and hasn‘t left for her holidays!

I got up early this morning to go on my regular breakfast/shopping run. We are having the first western Wednesday of 2015 (and the last of this term) next week and it is to be a wine fondue with meat. I have suggested we all buy our own meat for ourselves and our partners, that way nobody shoulders all the cost but I have taken it upon myself to prepare garlic bread (can’t trust a Frenchman to do that!), dips (heaven only knows if mixing chilli powder and mustard with mayonnaise will work but we will find out) and salad as accompaniments. Ollivier is not allowed to do salad any more after the last time when he virtually minced everything so you had to eat all or nothing. I prefer the English way with big chunks.

As I am currently bussing it I don’t want to carry heavy bags so I will make a repeat trip tomorrow and then again on Tuesday after class to get the salad so it’s fresh.

Anyway, when I got to the bus I saw people already on board but the doors were closed. A man, boy and two girls were waiting patiently in the cold for the driver to finish rinsing his mop outside the south gate security building. I said to the lad that if he pushed the button inside the flap beside the door the doors would open and he nodded but continued waiting. Thirty seconds later I thought to hell with this, I want a seat and some warmth, opened the flap and hit the button. With a dramatic hiss the doors opened, producing mixed reactions of astonishment and awe from my fellow queuees. They appeared indecisive as to whether it was “allowed” to get on (if the doors are open and there’s no driver it is a trust thing and everyone puts their money in the machine anyway) so I herded them aboard to much muttering which can only have been along the lines of my God, I can’t believe he just did that! I half expected the driver to return and demand to know who had the audacity and I was quite prepared to put my hand up - there are certain perks to being a laowei after all, but he never batted an eyelid, this being China.

In McDonald’s the pretty girl I like to see has now learnt two English words from me - big and breakfast. I am going to try and teach her enough that she  doesn’t need to get the picture card in dual language print out every time I go there so tomorrow we may work on sausage and egg McMuffin!

The charging socket on my four year old Lenovo 400y phone has now collapsed inside the casing and the only way now to charge the battery is by using a universal charger. That would involve removing the battery completely every time I want to charge, with the result of my being incommunicado and no alarm clock in the morning if I do it overnight. I don’t want to splash out on a new phone just yet so I have dug out my English Nokia and charged it up. I have forgotten how to work it after all this time but I am sure I will cope, the only problem is that it won’t accept Chinese characters so addresses to show cab drivers are out for the foreseeable future.

I should put a sign up outside my door saying “shower and laundry house” seeing as Anna is coming for both later and Joan is coming for a shower at seven. I don’t mind, I have offered these things to them and they both have keys if I am not here.

Saturday 3rd             1500

In the event Joan never tool a shower but we managed to watch the long film and even had just enough time to watch the London new year fireworks afterwards before my physio. I made steak and onion baguettes for us both, using what looked like (and cost appropriately) nice pieces of steak, albeit completely trimmed and rectangular. You rarely see a steak that looks like one in China. Anyway, suffice to say Pepsi was treated to four lumps of industrial fireproof carpet masquerading as beef shortly after we started to tuck (or struggle!) in. I think had I put the meat in a stew and simmered it for four hours I may have produced something chewable but I think the only way to get a proper steak here is to buy online at huge expense and get imported Australian stuff. Never again.

This morning Joan came for breakfast with me and lo and behold, they had run out of strawberry jam again and substituted ketchup of all things. I am probably their most regular customer so it shouldn’t be beyond them to warn me so that I can order something else but of course TIC (this is China). I now have a jar of pineapple jam - couldn’t find marmalade today - which I will take the next time I go and request they keep it there for me in case of any recurrence.

We went to RT Mart and I used the loyalty card I now have, courtesy of Joan. She is so sweet and thoughtful, I have never known anyone quite like her. She knew I never had my own card only because it came up one day and I said my ID number (being a foreign expert certificate) didn’t compute with the supermarkets. She made a special trip unbeknown to me just to get a card using her own ID. She does so much for me without my asking (including torturing me which I did request) that sometimes I feel simply feeding her suppers is nowhere near enough. Given that I am almost treble her age it makes it all the more extraordinary. And no, it will make no difference to her marks in the exam tomorrow morning!

When we got back I dropped her off at her dorm block and picked up Pepsi for our customary couple of beers in the office and on the way down encountered Ollivier cycling in the opposite direction with earphones firmly wedged in his ears and no doubt some awful French music belting out. I suggested he turn back and come with us (he had also been shopping in town) and he did so. That lad has loads of willpower, he just has very little won’t power.

Now it is siesta time, Joan hopefully has no evening class and we can watch episodes three and four of Wallander (he still hasn’t found the killer) and enjoy bacon and cheese baguettes, at least I know it won’t be as tough as army issue boots.