Friday, 27 April 2018


Friday 27th April, 2018 1930

I had a first during my last class yesterday. The class consists of all girls besides one boy, Robert. Alice is the monitor and I am aware that Robert believes he should be monitor and that Alice is a poor substitute. I personally think Alice is an excellent one, certainly from a teachers' point of view. In any event, the class itself elects their monitor although that does not seem to hamper Robert believing he is King of the class.

Well I was showing them the last half hour of Master and Commander before we all went home for the day. Anyone familiar with the film will know that there are periods during the film when it is very quiet and other times during battles when it is extremely loud.

I sat right at the back of the classroom and when it got to the fight to finally capture the frigate Acheron, it was of course high volume cannons. To my amazement, Robert stood up, strode to the front of the classroom and promptly turned the sound down! I was almost, but not quite, dumbfounded. Instead I resisted the urge to turn green and split my shirt (just), bellowed, rose and went to the front, evicting Robert and restoring the volume.

I then returned to my seat to fume until the credits rolled.

If a Chinese person doesn't like to lose face then in my opinion they should give no cause for it to happen. Usurping me in my fiefdom is in my eyes, just cause. After the film he received the biggest public bollocking I have ever had reason to deliver in the years I have taught and was left in no doubt that not only was I the King in my classroom but that just because he was the only boy, he was still only a student. I actually forced myself not to explode as I believe it had greater effect, as did making him publicly state he would never ever try anything like it again. I did allow myself a little “Hulkness” when I finished by telling him he wouldn't like me when I really got angry.

I am guessing within an hour Peili campus will have been awash with tales but hopefully it will do me more good than harm. If the vice dean accepts that she is a student when she sits in my class then he definitely needed bringing down a peg or three. The hell of it was, he wasn't even watching the damned film – he was playing on his phone!!

Today in contrast, I had a call on my way for my Pizza Hut jumbo American breakfast (which incidentally will be my entire consumption for the day) telling me there was an activity after lunch and could I be a judge. Sorry, I can't, I have class. Just before noon three students from the class I walked out on for playing dumb last week came to my office to ask me again. I said if they asked the powers and they said yes then I would, otherwise I couldn't simply cancel my class off my own bat. I knew they wouldn't ask.

So I sent Janet a text. Cancel your class, be a judge and tell the cancelled class to go to the activity! I had no idea what the activity was to be but knew once they told me it was in the playground (sports field) it wasn't a speaking competition.

It was synchronised dancing! As infuriating as teaching on the little campus can be at times, I do get classes cancelled so I can judge dancing, singing and other contests!

I also had a call from Brenda regarding a couple of small queries I had regarding the contract. At the end, she said oh yes, are you going anywhere for Labour holiday? Nope, it's a normal week for me. Oh ok, it's just that if you go anywhere you have to fill out a form and give it to Mr Zhang to sign before you travel.

Well that's standard fare, never actually happened before but in case of accident or sudden illness I have always informed my assistant teacher of my movements outside the city, I wouldn't want to be in hospital in Chongqing and spring a surprise. This however sounded as if I were being told to ask permission! Probably a language thing but I asked incredulously if they expected me to fill out a form then travel to main campus to hand it in? No no, I will send you one you can email and maybe you can correct the English for me. No skin off my nose just as long as they do not expect me to wait for royal assent before going somewhere. In a few days I shall turn 62 and if I wish to travel in my free time then I shall do so. I wonder how long it will last.......

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