Having now gained access to the student results from their tests (which as yet I have been too frightened to look at as I am certain they will be gruesome) and links to example exams, I decided to take one myself late last night. It was in the reading section.
Fifty questions with a time limit of half an hour. Ok so I am English and consider myself pretty damned good at it so in order to attempt to simulate the test as taken by a non-native speaker, I crammed it into ten minutes. Now believe me that was fast but despite having had no training, I am halfway competent with speed reading.
My score? 93%.
I know, I know, given more time I am confident I would have achieved 100% but it’s not me I am talking about here - it’s the very raw materials I have been given to work with and who allegedly want to go to Cyprus. I am beginning to seriously doubt the commitment of the vast majority of the Ocean’s Eleven I am confronted with and if asked, I can honestly say I believe I only have a slim chance of getting two of those up to par.
What on earth have I let myself in for?
This afternoon Janet sent me a text. A parcel had arrived for me which I am guessing is the new oven. Then she called me to say it wasn’t at the place I know from when my Chizhou boxes arrived but somewhere on the campus. Great. I have never been on the campus. Oh but it’s under the girls’ dormitory block. How the hell do I know where that is, considering I have never set foot in the place? And anyway, they need to bring it to my door, I can’t physically carry 15kg+ any distance.
Oh, just go out of your road and show the message to students, they will help. Psscchhht.
I did. To lots of students. None of them seemed to know precisely where my package was supposed to be and they live there! A lad was trying ever so hard to be helpful and kept trying to telephone the delivery people but had no response. Some girls arrived to help and eventually one of them went online on their phone and found that, less than half an hour after I had been advised it was here, my parcel had been taken away again!
Don’t worry, it will come back. Really? When? For how long? Ten minutes?
Plus wherever it is they are taking it (secret Aladdin’s cave) is about a kilometre away, although I walked two, following students who were no more in the know than I was. Once again the dice roll against me and I have sent Janet a message that if they can’t deliver it to me then they can take the bloody thing back to where it came from. There is another firm that does cash on delivery and with someone competent placing the order they will bring it to the barrier gate nearby so I can direct them to here. And they will wait because until I pay, they don’t get paid. So much for an oven cooked meal tomorrow.
AND my attempt at pitta bread didn’t go well (I was only mildly hopeful), although I think if I ever get an oven the dough I made will produce reasonable bread rolls.
Do you know, if I had more money I would have found an appliance shop, paid a bit more, bought one in-store and taken a taxi home. That way I would have had it instantly. If this is indicative of the majority of online ordering and deliveries here then it is going to make my life difficult indeed. God, imagine ordering cheese and sausages in the summer, you can’t immediately go and collect and they take the box away again to swelter for another night? Of course, if I had my own students here they could help but that would be too easy.
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